Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Hey Hey Hey Ho Ho Ho 2020 It's Gotta Go by Cross Stitch Wonders
Hey Hey Hey Ho Ho Ho 2020 It's Gotta Go
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A PERFECT summery of 2020, is this cute Christmas Saying counted cross stitch design. Cross Stitch design by Marcia Manning. Design is 79...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:79w x 76
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$3.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Dear Teacher by Iris Originals
Dear Teacher
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
This is dedicated to my youngest son - and very appropriate. Great for anyone who has this talkative child :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:85w x 71
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 skeins DMC or Anchor
On Sale:$5.35
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Instant Human by Iris Originals
Instant Human
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
"Instant Human - just add Coffee" Cute little chart for the coffee lover.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:83w x 47
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 DMC or Anchor
On Sale:$5.35
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Retro Mom's Roadkill Diner by PinoyStitch
Retro Mom's Roadkill Diner
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Mini Cross Stitch Pattern: Retro Mom's Roadkill Diner Design Source: Andy Nortnik DMC Floss Colors: 4 Stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:156w x 155
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 4
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$10.19
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Quotables Fitness Lipstick by PinoyStitch
Quotables Fitness Lipstick
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Quotables word art counted cross stitch patterns make great easy projects for all types of stitchers. These easy counted...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:74w x 51
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 7
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$7.19
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Knit Happens by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Knit Happens
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross stitch Sassy Ladies speak their mind! Designed retro style with quirky quotes for a fun project. Easy stitch, mostly full...
Pattern Details:
Size:4 w x 4 h Inches
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 12
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$6.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Opinion by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Opinion
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross stitch Sassy Ladies speak their mind! Designed retro style with quirky quotes for a fun project. Easy stitch, mostly full...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:58w x 49
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 12
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$6.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Ugly Xmas Sweater by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Ugly Xmas Sweater
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross stitch Sassy Ladies speak their mind! Designed retro style with quirky quotes for a fun project. Easy stitch, mostly full stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:58w x 50
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 13
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$6.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Modern Dictionary: Girl by Stitchnmomma
Modern Dictionary: Girl
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
Looking for a quick weekend project? Then this piece from my Modern Dictionary Series is perfect for you! This series gives fun, modern...
Pattern Details:
Size:varies with fabric used
Fabric:0
Floss:1 DMC Cotton color
On Sale:$6.35
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Happiness is Pizza by Romy's Creations
Happiness is Pizza
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Romy's Creations
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
On Sale:$10.19
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Don't Ask by Iris Originals
Don't Ask
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
That would be me most mornings! Great gift for your coffeeholic friend or for your own 'coffee station'.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:118w x 97
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:12 colors of Anchor or DMC
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Adventure for Introverts by Peacock & Fig
Adventure for Introverts
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Just in case the past few years have been a bit **too** adventurous for your taste, the Adventure for Introverts cross stitch pattern lets...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:94w x 127
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$10.15
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Lose Something by Iris Originals
Lose Something
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Oh yeah! That's my life these days. I just wish I knew where all those "safe places" are.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:93w x 88
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
On Sale:$5.49
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Secret Recipe by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Secret Recipe
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:59w x 49
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 12
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$6.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Memory Error by Silver Creek Samplers
Memory Error
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Silver Creek Samplers
Add a nostalgic twist to your stitching with Memory Error by Silver Creek Samplers. This playful design features a retro-inspired character...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:123w x 77
Fabric:18ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$11.05
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Give a Damn by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Give a Damn
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Mini Cross Stitch Pattern: Sassy Lady Give a Damn Design Source: PInoyStitch DMC Floss Colors: 14 Stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:57w x 49
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 14
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$6.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Just Say No by Peacock & Fig
Just Say No
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Have you ever had days where you want to just say no to stupidity?! This elegant and funny cross stitch pattern is perfect for making you...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
On Sale:$10.15
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Cross Stitch Patterns, What Are Girls by Homespun Elegance Ltd
What Are Girls
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Homespun Elegance Ltd
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
On Sale:$6.35
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Queen Bee by Peacock & Fig
Queen Bee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
This gorgeous cross stitch pattern is the perfect inspirational quote for women! Let the world know you are the Queen Bee with glamour and...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC, Kreinik
Designer:Peacock & Fig
On Sale:$10.15
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Cross Stitch Patterns, So Much Nope by Peacock & Fig
So Much Nope
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
This elegant vintage cross stitch pattern is inspired by antique French illustrations, but there’s nothing antique about the quote!
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
On Sale:$7.59
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Queen: Who Says You Can't Have It All? by PinoyStitch
Queen: Who Says You Can't Have It All?
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Mini Cross Stitch Pattern: Queen: Who Says You Can't Have It All? Design Source: Diddy Bag DMC Floss...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:134w x 121
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 13
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$7.65
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Your Problem/Duct Tape by X's & Oh's
Your Problem/Duct Tape
a Cross Stitch Pattern by X's & Oh's
"I'm already envisioning the duct tape over your mouth..." "I don't know what your problem is, but I bet it's hard to pronounce..." Model...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:119w x 89
Fabric:28ct. Jobelan Water Cress
On Sale:$8.49
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Measure of a Man by White Willow Stitching
Measure of a Man
a Cross Stitch Pattern by White Willow Stitching
Ready to giggle? Between fish stories and other man stories many of us know this one in our sleep and now StitchBitch has brought it to us...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:3 DMC Floss colors
Designer:StitchBitch
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Fun Mom - Messy Bun .... by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Fun Mom - Messy Bun ....
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great Sassy Fun Mom Words Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this Sassy Fun Mom cross stitch design from artwork by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:99w x 89
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$3.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... GARDEN and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... GARDEN and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any GARDENING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... GARDEN and Take Naps!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Your Attitude... by Sue Hillis Designs
Your Attitude...
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
This spirited pattern set features three playful sayings—“She’s got that girl boss hustle,” “Get stuff done,” and “Alexa, skip to...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:63w x 95
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$8.49
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Modern Dictionary: Boy by Stitchnmomma
Modern Dictionary: Boy
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
Looking for a quick weekend project? Then this piece from my Modern Dictionary Series is perfect for you! This series gives fun, modern...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:54w x 33
Fabric:14ct. aida
Floss:1 DMC Cotton color
On Sale:$6.35
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Good Grief by Iris Originals
Good Grief
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well this describes me perfectly. It can almost be looking at me and I still can't find it.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 91
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Schools Out - Goodbye Lesson Plan Hello Sun Tan by Cross Stitch Wonders
Schools Out - Goodbye Lesson Plan Hello Sun Tan
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great SCHOOLS OUT Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 98 stitches wide by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:98w x 96
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$3.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Schools Out - See Ya Later Educator by Cross Stitch Wonders
Schools Out - See Ya Later Educator
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great SCHOOLS OUT Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 100 stitches wide by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 98
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$3.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Schools Out - The End Is Near #hellosummer by Cross Stitch Wonders
Schools Out - The End Is Near #hellosummer
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great SCHOOLS OUT Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 96 stitches wide by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:96w x 98
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$3.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Adulting All Over by Peacock & Fig
Adulting All Over
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Do you amaze yourself some days with the fact that you made it through the day and coped with all sorts of adult stuff and didn’t have a...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
On Sale:$10.15
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Cross Stitch Patterns, My Drinking Friends ... Fishing Problem by Cross Stitch Wonders
My Drinking Friends ... Fishing Problem
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great FRIENDS/DRINKING Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Design is 135 stitches wide by 98 stitches high. Included is a large/easy...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:135w x 98
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$3.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Quotables Wild Thing by PinoyStitch
Quotables Wild Thing
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Quotables word art counted cross stitch patterns make great easy projects for all types of stitchers. These easy counted...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:56w x 48
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 6
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$7.19
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Life Happens by Iris Originals
Life Happens
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, that's the way I feel a lot of mornings (and afternoons and evenings). Coffee always helps.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:75w x 61
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
On Sale:$5.35
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Love a Great Ass by White Willow Stitching
Love a Great Ass
a Cross Stitch Pattern by White Willow Stitching
Perfect for all Donkey lovers or just those who have a jackass in the family! This sassy and humorous monochrome cross stitch chart is...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:126w x 81
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 Skeins DMC floss
On Sale:$7.65
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee Survivor by Iris Originals
Coffee Survivor
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Coffee Survivor - one who can ask for coffee in any language!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:89w x 78
Fabric:14ct. Fiddler's Cloth Oatmeal Lite
Floss:5 DMC or Anchor colors
On Sale:$5.35
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Full Time Job by Imaginating
Full Time Job
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
This leaflet includes the chart and instructions.   The floss, fabric and any other supplies required to complete the project are...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:94w x 69
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Unicorn by Kiokiz
Unicorn
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Kiokiz
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, MetalFoot's Missives I by Stitchnmomma
MetalFoot's Missives I
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
A fun, easy stitched "subversive" style quote in a series created by my son "MetalFoot". This design uses just 4 colors and all full...
Pattern Details:
Size:varies with fabric used
Fabric:0
Floss:4 DMC Cotton Colors
On Sale:$7.65
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Cross Stitch Patterns, You are my dino-mite by Kiokiz
You are my dino-mite
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:44w x 45
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC 7 colors
On Sale:$4.25
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Good Morning by Amy Bruecken Designs
Good Morning
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Amy Bruecken Designs
Cross stitch pattern from Amy Bruecken Designs featuring the phrase "Here we go again. I mean...Good Morning"! Model stitched on Picture...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:191w x 80
Fabric:28ct. Linen Vintage Country Mocha
Floss:Weeks Dye Works
On Sale:$11.89
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Laundry....Again? by New York Dreamer
Laundry....Again?
a Cross Stitch Pattern by New York Dreamer
Cross stitch pattern from New York Dreamer featuring the phrase "Laundry the never ending cycle"! The design was stitched on 32 ct....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:115w x 90
Fabric:32ct. Linen Natural Light
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$11.89
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Petty by Lucy Beam
Petty
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Lucy Beam
Cross Stitch pattern from Lucy Beam Love in Stitches that says "Pray for me I'm petty". The model was stitched on 36ct. Tiramisu Opal by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 98
Fabric:36ct. Linen Platinum/China White
Floss:Gentle Art
On Sale:$10.19
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sissies by Iris Originals
Sissies
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, I can promise that - old age is definitely not for sissies. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 93 x 95. Model stitched on...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:93w x 95
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, She Who MUST Be Obeyed by Artecy Cross Stitch
She Who MUST Be Obeyed
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artecy Cross Stitch
This counted cross stitch pattern was designed from the beautiful artwork of Gail Gastfield. Only full cross stitches are used in this...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:148w x 148
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:38 DMC colors
On Sale:$13.55
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Is This Day by Pine Glen Designs
Is This Day
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Pine Glen Designs
This sampler askes the question that we all find ourselves asking on those days when "nothing goes right".
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:88w x 63
Fabric:0
On Sale:$4.25
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Cross Stitch Patterns, When Life Gives you Lemons by Iris Originals
When Life Gives you Lemons
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
"When life gives you lemons, put them in your sweet tea and thank God you're a southerner!" And if you're not a southerner - you can still...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:73w x 110
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:2 colors Anchor or DMC
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Don't Eat The Seeds by Homespun Elegance Ltd
Don't Eat The Seeds
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Homespun Elegance Ltd
-Stitched on 30ct Parchment Linen by Weeks Dye Works -Stitch count 88w x 58h (5.87" x 3.87") We do not carry the 30ct Parchment Linen...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:88w x 58
Fabric:30ct. Linen Lambswool
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$6.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Godzilla by Iris Originals
Godzilla
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, I don't know about your 2020, but mine has been turned upside down - just about like something Godzilla would do.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:102w x 97
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:7 colors Anchor or DMC
On Sale:$5.95
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