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Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns
Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Schools Out - The End Is Near #hellosummer
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great SCHOOLS OUT Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 96 stitches wide by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
96w x 98
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$3.79
Add Pattern to Cart
My Drinking Friends ... Fishing Problem
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great FRIENDS/DRINKING Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Design is 135 stitches wide by 98 stitches high. Included is a large/easy...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
135w x 98
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$3.79
Add Pattern to Cart
My Drinking Friends ... Camping Problem
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great FRIENDS/CAMPING Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this from Exclusive artwork by Sanquentti Design....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
130w x 98
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$3.79
Add Pattern to Cart
Roses are Red Violets are Blue ... Poo
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
It's a sweet, humorous thank-you note from your furry friend—perfectly capturing that adorable blend of love and, well… responsibility....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
118w x 139
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.09
Add Pattern to Cart
A Cat Saying - I Run on Coffee, Sarcasm And Cats
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A GREAT CAT SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 198 stitches wide by 192 stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
192w x 198
Floss:
DMC
Designer:
Marcia Manning
On Sale:
$5.09
Add Pattern to Cart
A Dog Saying - I Run on Coffee, Sarcasm and Dogs
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A GREAT DOG SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 198 stitches wide by 198 stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
198w x 198
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$5.09
Add Pattern to Cart
My Dog Thinks I'm Cool
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
My Dog Thinks I'm Cool - She's(He's) Very Wise. Licensed artwork by Anastasia Feya. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 160 x 146....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
160w x 146
Fabric:
16ct. Aida White
Floss:
2 DMC colors
On Sale:
$5.09
Add Pattern to Cart
My Cat Thinks I'm Cool
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
My Cat Thinks I'm Cool She's Very Wise. (omit the S in she if you have a male cat) :-) A GREAT CAT SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
160w x 155
Fabric:
16ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$5.09
Add Pattern to Cart
The Queen
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Imaginating
Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 105 x 105. Model stitched on 14ct White Aida using DMC floss.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
105w x 105
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
10 DMC colors
On Sale:
$5.09
Add Pattern to Cart
Life Is What Happens Between Coffee And Beer
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great LIFE IS WHAT HAPPENS BETWEEN COFFEE AND BEER saying/phrase design. Designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 80 stitches wide by 128...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
80w x 128
Fabric:
16ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$5.09
Add Pattern to Cart
If you keep a glass of WINE in each hand, you can't touch your face.
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great WINE saying with wearing a mask for Covid in mind! IF YOU KEEP A GLASS OF WINE IN EACH HAND, YOU CAN'T TOUCH YOUR FACE counted...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
180w x 116
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$5.09
Add Pattern to Cart
If you keep a BEER in each hand, you can't touch your face.
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great BEER saying with wearing a mask for Covid in mind! IF YOU KEEP A BEER IN EACH HAND, YOU CAN'T TOUCH YOUR FACE counted cross stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
180w x 96
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$5.09
Add Pattern to Cart
Queen of Quite a Lot
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by The Scarlett House
Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 111 x 66. Model stitched on 40ct Legacy linen by Picture This Plus using DMC floss. We do not...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
111w x 66
Fabric:
40ct. Linen
Floss:
6 DMC colors
On Sale:
$5.60
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series I - Hold On Let Me Over Think This
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
For anyone whose brain never seems to hit the pause button, this witty design perfectly captures the art of overthinking. Counted cross...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
109w x 160
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
8 DMC colors
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series I - Sorry! I Don't Take Orders I Barely Take Suggestions
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
For those who prefer to do things their own way, this witty design delivers plenty of sass and humor. Counted cross stitch pattern....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
109w x 160
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
7 DMC colors
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
I Just Want To Drink .... CROSS STITCH and Take Naps
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A wonderful saying for any CROSS STITCH enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Coffee (or Beer, Tea, Wine, Cocktails) CROSS STITCH and Take Naps!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
100w x 90
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
I Just Want To Drink .... READ BOOKS and Take Naps
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any READING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Tea (or Coffee, Beer, Wine, Cocktails) READ BOOKS and Take Naps! Included...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
100w x 90
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
OMG They Got Me a Whole Tree
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 63 x 78. Model stitched on 14ct fabric using DMC floss. Great project for perforated paper,...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
63w x 78
Fabric:
14ct. Aida Vintage Blue Whisper
Floss:
7 DMC colors
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
A MUGnificent Stitch - YES, I DO HAVE A RETIREMENT PLAN I PLAN ON CAMPING
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great RETIREMENT / CAMPING SAYING design with a plaid background in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch designs!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
154w x 156
Floss:
DMC
Designer:
Marcia Manning
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series I - Be Happy it Drives People Crazy
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A colorful reminder to choose happiness and let go of what others think. This uplifting design is perfect for anyone who embraces life with...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
109w x 160
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series I - Born to Argue
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
For those who always have a comeback ready, this colorful and humorous design is perfect for anyone who proudly admits they were simply...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
109w x 160
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series I - Caution I Have No Filter
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
For those who proudly speak their mind, this playful design features a bold "I Have No Filter" warning that's perfect for adding a little...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
109w x 160
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series I - I Run a Tight Shipwreck
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
For anyone who's ever felt like they're barely keeping it together, this nautical-inspired design delivers the perfect dose of humor. A fun...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
109w x 160
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series I - I'm Not Weird I'm Limited Edition
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
Celebrate what makes you unique with this bright and uplifting design! A fun reminder that you're not weird—you're simply one of a kind and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
109w x 160
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series I - Ugliness can be fixed. Stupidity is forever.
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A little sarcastic, a little sassy, and guaranteed to get a laugh! This witty design is perfect for anyone who appreciates sharp humor and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
109w x 160
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series II - Be a Stiletto in Room of Flats
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
Stand out from the crowd with this fun and empowering design featuring the inspiring reminder to "Be a Stiletto in a Room of Flats." A...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
140w x 99
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series II - I'm Just a Person Standing in Front of a Salad Asking it to Be a Donut
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
Life's toughest decisions are sometimes the sweetest! This humorous design is perfect for anyone who has ever wished a salad would...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
140w x 99
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series II - Looks Aren't Everything But I Have Them Just in Case
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
For the beauty lovers who know mascara solves almost everything! This fun and fashionable design is perfect for anyone who believes life's...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
140w x 99
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
I Just Want To Drink .... CRAFT and Take Naps
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any CRAFTING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... CRAFT and Take Naps! Included...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
100w x 90
Fabric:
14ct. aida white
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
I Just Want To Drink .... CROCHET and Take Naps
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any CROCHETING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... CROCHET and Take Naps!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
100w x 900
Floss:
DMC
Designer:
Marcia Manning
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
I Just Want To Drink .... GO FISHING and Take Naps
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any FISHING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Beer (or Coffee, Tea, Wine, Cocktails) GO FISHING and Take Naps! Included...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
100w x 90
Floss:
DMC
Designer:
Marcia Manning
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
I Just Want To Drink .... GARDEN and Take Naps
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any GARDENING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... GARDEN and Take Naps!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
100w x 90
Floss:
DMC
Designer:
Marcia Manning
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
I Just Want To Drink .... GO CAMPING and Take Naps
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any CAMPING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails (or Coffee, Beer, Wine, Tea) GO CAMPING and Take Naps! Included...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
100w x 90
Floss:
DMC
Designer:
Marcia Manning
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
A MUGnificent Stitch - ANOTHER WINE DRINKER WITH A CAMPING PROBLEM
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great WINE / FRIEND / CAMPING SAYING design with a plaid background in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch designs!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
154w x 156
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
I Just Want To Drink .... GAMBLE and Take Naps
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any GAMBLING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... GAMBLE and Take Naps!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
100w x 90
Floss:
DMC
Designer:
Marcia Manning
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
I Just Want To Drink .... SAVE ANIMALS and Take Naps
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any ANIMAL / RESCUE / SHELTER enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Wine (or Coffee, Beer, Tea, Cocktails) SAVE ANIMALS and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
100w x 90
Floss:
DMC
Designer:
Marcia Manning
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
A MUGnificent Stitch - MY DRINKING FRIENDS HAVE A CAMPING PROBLEM 2
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great DRINKING / FRIEND / CAMPING SAYING design with a plaid background in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
154w x 156
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
A MUGnificent Stitch - MY DRINKING FRIENDS HAVE A CAMPING PROBLEM
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great DRINKING / FRIEND / CAMPING SAYING design with a plaid background in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
154w x 156
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
A MUGnificent Stitch - Peas Be Kind to Others
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Beautiful FARMERS MARKET THEME SAYING design in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch designs! PEAS BE KIND TO OTHERS...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
154w x 156
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series I - Eye Rolling is My Cardio
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
Perfect for anyone fluent in sarcasm, this colorful design features the hilarious phrase, "Eye Rolling Is My Cardio." A fun stitch that's...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
109w x 160
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series I - It's a Beautiful Day to Leave Me Alone
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A cheerful reminder to embrace each day with a positive outlook, this uplifting design encourages you to focus on the sunshine and leave...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
109w x 160
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series I - It's Okay if You Don't Like Me. Not Everyone Has Good Taste.
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A little sassy and full of confidence, this humorous design is perfect for anyone who believes that not everyone has good taste. A fun...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
109w x 160
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series II - Butt First Coffee
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
Start your day with a smile and a cup of coffee! This playful design featuring a mischievous cat is the perfect stitch for coffee lovers...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
140w x 99
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series II - Come to the Dark Side We Have Cookies
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
oin the fun side with this cheeky design featuring the irresistible invitation, "Come to the Dark Side... We Have Cookies." A playful...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
140w x 99
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series II - I Don't Like Morning People. Or People. Or Mornings.
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
Not a morning person? This hilarious design says it all! Perfect for anyone who needs coffee before conversation and isn't afraid to admit...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
140w x 99
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series II - I Eat Cake Because It's Somebody's Birthday Somewhere
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
Life's too short to skip dessert! This colorful and lighthearted design is perfect for anyone who believes it's always somebody's birthday...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
140w x 99
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series II - Kiss My Sass
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A little bold, a little sassy, and guaranteed to get a laugh! This playful design is perfect for anyone with a feisty sense of humor and a...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
140w x 99
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series II - Sarcasm Level Expert
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
For those who have mastered the art of witty comebacks, this hilarious design features a "Sarcasm Level: Expert" meter that's perfect for...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
140w x 99
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
Sassy Threads Series II - Zero Meows Given
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
Perfect for cat lovers with a sassy streak, this playful design features the cheeky phrase "Zero Meows Given." A fun stitch that's sure to...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
140w x 99
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC Floss
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
A MUGnificent Stitch - DON'T KALE MY VIBE
a
Cross Stitch Pattern
by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Beautiful FARMERS MARKET THEME SAYING design in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch designs! DON'T KALE MY VIBE in...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:
154w x 156
Fabric:
14ct. Aida White
Floss:
DMC
On Sale:
$5.95
Add Pattern to Cart
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