Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns - Page 3

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Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.

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Ho Ho No

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig

Have a low tolerance for Christmas shenanigans? Or just want a “subtle” way to tell your family to not overstay their welcome? Channel your...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:40w x 51

Floss:DMC

Designer:Peacock & Fig

$5.98

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Lump of Coal

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig

Here’s the perfect gift to make for that family member that does all of their Christmas shopping at the dollar store. Tell them how much...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:60w x 60

Floss:DMC

Designer:Peacock & Fig

$5.98

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"Let's Party!"

a Cross Stitch Pattern by StitchyFish Designs

Brand New! "Let's Party!" by StitchyFishDesigns It's Halloween and all the little ghoulie's are out to party... but some may be more...

Pattern Details:

Floss:DMC

Designer:Lee Fisher - StitchyFish Designs

$5.98

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Bookstore

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery

Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 108 x 32. Chart will be in color and project includes full stitches, quarter stitches, half...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:108w x 32

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

The reason I'm old and wise is that God protected me when I was young and stupid! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 89 x 89....

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:89w x 89

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:5 DMC colors

$6.00

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue ... Poo

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

It's a sweet, humorous thank-you note from your furry friend—perfectly capturing that adorable blend of love and, well… responsibility....

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:118w x 139

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Don't Make Old People Mad - we don't like being old in the first place so it doesn't take much to piss us off. Counted cross stitch...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:70w x 87

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

This probably fits most of us... but when we get there, well, maybe being a kid isn't such a bad thing after all.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:95w x 91

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

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Getting Old Ain't for Sissies

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Well, this one about says it all - getting old definitely AIN'T for Sissies! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 143 x 133....

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:143w x 133

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating

Shoot for the stars with this sweet and whimsical design! Featuring a colorful rocket ship, crescent moon, and twinkling stars, it’s...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:84w x 127

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating

A fun and colorful project that explains what exactly is the best therapy around!Let's Go To Therapy is designed to be stitched on 14ct...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:131w x 116

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:5 DMC floss colors

$6.00

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Sit on the Floor

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Note to self...Do not sit on the floor without a plan on how to get up. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 98 x 115. Model...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:98w x 115

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Boy, is this a true statement.... and my body definitely isn't pleased, though I'm thankful for every day!

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:83w x 93

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:6 colors DMC or Anchor

$6.00

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Aged Wine

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Bobbie G Designs

Pour a little humor into your stitching with Aged Wine! Surrounded by bottles and lush bunches of grapes, this playful design features the...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:43w x 140

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:DMC Floss

Multiple styles available

$6.00

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Rolling Eyes

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

"I'm sorry, did I roll my eyes out loud?" I'm sure you never do that - unfortunately I do it frequently so this is an appropriate saying...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:80w x 112

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC floss

$6.00

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Act My Age

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Well, this saying is true - for most anyone - but especially for "old people". (I can say that - I'm an old people.) Cute saying for...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:95w x 81

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:6 DMC or Anchor colors

$6.00

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Common Sense

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Just a little cute saying - unfortunately that flower truly doesn't grow in everyone's garden.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:60w x 62

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:DMC or Anchor floss

$6.00

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A Cat Saying - I Run on Coffee, Sarcasm And Cats

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A GREAT CAT SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 198 stitches wide by 192 stitches...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:192w x 198

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

$6.00

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Laundry Prayer

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Bobbie G Designs

Add a little humor to your homemaking with Laundry Prayer! This playful design features a funny prayer for laundry day, complete with a...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:85w x 113

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:DMC Floss

Multiple styles available

$6.00

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If Mama Ain't Happy

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Well, it's true - if Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy - but... watch out for Grandma!

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:104w x 62

Fabric:14ct. aida white

Floss:2 DMC or Anchor floss

$6.00

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A Dog Saying - I Run on Coffee, Sarcasm and Dogs

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A GREAT DOG SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 198 stitches wide by 198 stitches...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:198w x 198

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

If you have dogs or cats, you probably can relate to this. Especially in the world we live in now. My little furbabies think they have to...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:102w x 64

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

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Be Decisive

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Be decisive. Make a decision. The road of life is paved with flat squirrels who couldn't make a decision. Counted cross stitch pattern....

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:71w x 73

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood

In my defense, the moon was full and I was unsupervised. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 120 x 92. Model stitched on 14ct...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:120w x 92

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Well, this one sure fits me, and probably a LOT of other stitchers out there. But, that's Okay, it's our mess and we love it.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:89w x 89

Fabric:14ct. Aida

Floss:8 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

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Retired

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

What do you call a person who is happy on Monday - Retired. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 91 x 91. Model stitched on 14ct...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:91w x 91

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Finally a Farmgirl Designs

Faith and coffee make the perfect blend! This warm and inspiring design features the heartfelt saying, "Jesus in My Heart and Coffee in My...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:60w x 69

Fabric:28ct. Linen Summer Khaki

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:117w x 89

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

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Too Tired

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Well, that pretty well describes me these days. :-)

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:88w x 87

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

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Dog in Charge

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating

Man's best friend is always in charge and this adorable design is the perfect way to display their badge of honor! Counted cross stitch...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:86w x 93

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:7 DMC colors

$6.00

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A Dog Saying - My Dog Thinks I'm Cool

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

My Dog Thinks I'm Cool She's Very Wise. (omit the S in she if you have a male dog) :-) A GREAT DOG SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:160w x 146

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by White Willow Stitching

Bitch is a subversive and sassy saying cross stitch chart designed by my dear friend StitchBitch. This line of charts requires a twisted...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:45w x 51

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:5 DMC floss colors

$6.00

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Coffee-isms #1a

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma

If you’re a coffee fanatic, or know someone who is, then you’d probably agree that this sentiment is perfect. Counted cross stitch...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:66w x 48

Fabric:32ct. Linen Cream

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma

A little dark humor for serious coffee lovers. This witty design is a quick and fun stitch for anyone who knows that caffeine comes...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:36w x 36

Fabric:32ct. Linen Cream

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma

For those who run on caffeine, this fun and witty design says it all! A quick stitch that's perfect for coffee lovers with a sense of...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:71w x 50

Fabric:32ct. Linen Cream

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma

A sweet and witty design for anyone who believes true love comes with the irresistible aroma of freshly brewed coffee. Counted cross...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:67w x 60

Fabric:32ct. Linen Cream

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma

Short, simple and delightfully sassy. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 33 x 24. Model stitched on 32ct Cream Evenweave using...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:33w x 24

Fabric:32ct. Linen Cream

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Unstoppable - if I could just get started. Unfortunately, that would be me on many days :-) Great gift for a busy friend - or stitch for...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:95w x 96

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:4 skeins Anchor or DMC

$6.00

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Poke it with a Stick

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

I'm not much on seizing the day. I just kinda poke it with a stick! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 80 x 91. Model stitched on...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:80w x 91

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:4 DMC colors

$6.00

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Inside Every Old Person

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Inside every old person is a young person wondering what happened! And how true is that?! But you know - at least we're old - better than...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:92w x 99

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:4 DMC or Anchor colors

$6.00

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My Cat.... Wakes Me EARLY

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

So you have a cat who wakes you --- or you have a friend that does. This is a compliment chart to my "My Dog". So now both are available...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:110w x 82

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:5 DMC or Anchor

$6.00

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Bears will Kill You

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

I've heard many times, "that which doesn't kill you will make you stronger"...but I sure don't want to meet a bear - don't think I could...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:131w x 103

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating

This leaflet includes the chart and instructions. The floss, fabric and any other supplies required to complete the project are...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:160w x 140

Fabric:18ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Yup, everyday. Just because I think it doesn't mean I should say it!

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:107w x 90

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

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Stupid Things

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Another 'old people' chart - and I'm entitled to offer this.... since I'm old. Hopefully I'm not doing quite as many stupid things,...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:110w x 103

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:5 colors DMC or Anchor

$6.00

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My Cat Thinks I'm Cool

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

My Cat Thinks I'm Cool She's Very Wise. (omit the S in she if you have a male cat) :-) A GREAT CAT SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:160w x 155

Fabric:16ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating

This leaflet includes the chart and instructions. The floss, fabric and any other supplies required to complete the project are...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:134w x 54

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood

Don't panic. Organize! A design for anti-bullying, pro community or individual empowerment.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:112w x 109

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by White Willow Stitching

Stupid is designed by my friend StitchBitch who has a wicked, sharp and twisted sense of humor. Designed using full stitches as well as...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:52w x 70

Floss:7 DMC floss colors

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating

Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 105 x 105. Model stitched on 14ct White Aida using DMC floss.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:105w x 105

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:10 DMC colors

$6.00

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