Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns - Page 4

FREE SHIPPING

on all US orders over $50.00!

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.

Show More

Show Less

Please Wait ...

Home

Themes

Just for Baby

Special Events

Holidays

Seasons

Spiritual

Home Sweet Home

Transportation

Phrases & Sayings

Buildings & Architecture

Scenes

Animals

Classic Cross Stitch

Plants

Trees
Fruit

Cultures & Countries

People

Fantasy

Other

Product Type

Filters:

Side Effects

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Don't you know it - the older I get (and yes, I am old) the more I know I'm old from the way I'm feeling. Everyone knows that all meds...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:93w x 96

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:5 colors DMC or Anchor

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

A Stitch a Day

a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood

A Stitch A Day. It's true! I need my stitching time or I'm just not quite right! Fun cross stitch pattern!

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:80w x 100

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:DMC # 3778 (brick red) and #310 (black). Feel free to use your own favortite colors and fabrics.

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Wednesday - friday

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Goodness - sometimes don't you just look at that calendar and think - or no, it's only Wednesday when I was ready for Friday?! This says...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:84w x 88

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:3 DMC or Anchor colors

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Weird

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Well, it really is! Yes, I'm old - but in my mind I don't feel old. I suspect there are many like me. Great for yourself or gift for a...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:101w x 76

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Sunshine

a Cross Stitch Pattern by White Willow Stitching

A great cross stitch chart for those with a twisted sense of humor. The StitchBitch line of charts are not for those faint of heart and...

Pattern Details:

Fabric:0

Floss:6 DMC floss colors

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Cute chart for those who aren't crazy about cooking (that would be me).

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:105w x 84

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Work on Your Problem

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Ever had someone who wanted you to drop everything and work on.... well, you know. Cute saying for an office wall - makes a great gift.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:95w x 52

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:4 colors DMC or Anchor

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

I'm Explaining

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Just another cute saying - and yes, I am right :-)

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:99w x 78

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Look in the Mirror

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Probably this never happens to you - but it's the same at my house every day. "Who is that person?"

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:87w x 114

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:8 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Worry

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Worry - it changes nothing, except maybe our health. It accomplishes nothing - except perhaps making us feel worse. But, we all do it -...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:79w x 54

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Dust Bunnies

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Linda Jeanne Jenkins

Family and friends aren't the only ones to gather at our homes! Just when we're not looking, a few little "critters" slip in to join the...

Pattern Details:

Fabric:0

Floss:Gentle Arts 0350, 1050, 7041, 7060 and Rainbow Gallery Whisper W60 with DMC substitutions listed.

Designer:Linda Jeanne Jenkins

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

When I am Old....Grandchildren

a Cross Stitch Pattern by MarNic Designs

"If I'd know grandchildren were this much fun, I'd had them to begin with!" Model stitched 28 Ct. Antique White Jobelan with DMC floss and...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:119w x 88

Fabric:28ct. Jobelan Antique White

Floss:DMC Floss and Kreinik

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

The Older I Get

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Yeah, unfortunately that sign says it all.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:101w x 65

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Minis: Chocolate is the Answer

a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch

Cross Stitch Pattern: Chocolate is the Answer Designed by: ©...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:57w x 59

Fabric:14ct. Aida

Floss:DMC Colors: 10

Multiple styles available

$6.00

View Pattern

I'm Not OCD

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Would you really do this - turn the toilet paper roll to go a different way at someone else's house? I've sure been tempted.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:103w x 85

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:3 colors DMC or Anchor floss

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Shoelaces

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:67w x 67

Fabric:14ct. Aida Lambswool

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

If you keep a glass of WINE in each hand, you can't touch your face.

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A great WINE saying with wearing a mask for Covid in mind! IF YOU KEEP A GLASS OF WINE IN EACH HAND, YOU CAN'T TOUCH YOUR FACE counted...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:180w x 116

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Yup, that's the special many days - lack of sleep, up to early and definitely low on patience. :-)

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:107w x 118

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

People Skills

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

"I made it though the day without beating anyone with a chair, I'd say my people skills are improving".

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:99w x 105

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:4 colors DMC or Anchor

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Just Pee on It

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Sometimes I'd really like to do that - just pee on it and walk away.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:125w x 94

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:5 skeins DMC or Anchor

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

If you keep a BEER in each hand, you can't touch your face.

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A great BEER saying with wearing a mask for Covid in mind! IF YOU KEEP A BEER IN EACH HAND, YOU CAN'T TOUCH YOUR FACE counted cross stitch...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:180w x 96

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Don't know about you - but there are LOTS of lids out there that I can't open these days. They sure don't make things for older people to...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:97w x 96

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Aging

a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood

A funny cross stitch pattern to remind us all to laugh at ourselves occasionally and remember that while aging isn’t always fun… it sure...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:118w x 70

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:DMC #310... or your favorite!

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Sparkly Stuff

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

"I was going to take over the world, but I got distracted by something sparkly" I love sparkly stuff, so this was a no brainer for me. ...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:76w x 88

Fabric:14ct. Aida Opalescent on White

Floss:1 color DMC or Anchor and one color Nordic Gold

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

My Dog

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Cute little saying about my dog - and yes, he really does think I'm awesome :-)

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:86w x 54

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:4 skeins Anchor or DMC

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Talk To Me Goose

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Silver Creek Samplers

This fun and quirky design features a bold, expressive goose paired with playful lettering for a touch of humor and farmhouse flair. With...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:62w x 38

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Bobbie G Designs

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:88w x 91

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Never Drive Faster Than Your Broom Can Fly

a Cross Stitch Pattern by MarNic Designs

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:48w x 34

a Cross Stitch Pattern by White Willow Stitching

Ready to giggle? Between fish stories and other man stories many of us know this one in our sleep and now StitchBitch has brought it to us...

Pattern Details:

Fabric:0

Floss:3 DMC Floss colors

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Well this describes me perfectly. It can almost be looking at me and I still can't find it.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:90w x 91

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Full Time Job

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating

This leaflet includes the chart and instructions. The floss, fabric and any other supplies required to complete the project are...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:94w x 69

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz

When Life Gives you Lemons

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

"When life gives you lemons, put them in your sweet tea and thank God you're a southerner!" And if you're not a southerner - you can still...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:73w x 110

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:2 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Silence you Peasant

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Ever just wanted to tell someone "shut up" - try it this way :-)

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:87w x 92

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by White Willow Stitching

Bad Boy is designed by my friend StitchBitch who has a wicked, sharp and twisted sense of humor. Designed using full stitches and...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:79w x 62

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:6 DMC floss colors

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Chocolate Resistance

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Erica Michaels Designs

Personally, for me there is no resistance happening whatsoever - but perhaps that's easier for others! This quick-to-stitch design is just...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:141w x 47

Fabric:36ct. Linen Vintage Country Mocha

Floss:Weeks Dye Works

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Happy New Year!

a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood

Here is a funny design. Happy New Year! Let’s try this again. Fortunately, we get to do that each year, and hopefully make it better each...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:67w x 81

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:DMC #310 (black). Also pictured in red (#321) and blue (#517)

$6.00

Add Pattern to Cart

Protecting Mama

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

My little dog barks at EVERYTHING! Maybe you know someone with one like that - or do you have one too.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:92w x 107

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:4 colors DMC or Anchor

$6.30

Add Pattern to Cart

Rough Week

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

"It's been a rough week. But on a positive side I didn't need any bail money and i didn't have to hide any bodies." Cute saying for...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:95w x 126

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:3 colors DMC or Anchor

$6.30

Add Pattern to Cart

Seriously

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

About right - have YOU ever looked at someone and thought that? :-)

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:6w x 5

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:7 skeins DMC or Anchor

$6.30

Add Pattern to Cart

Coffee in My Hand

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

I'm a coffee addict - so love everything coffee - just can't help myself from designing yet another 'cute' coffee saying.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:94w x 94

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:6 colors DMC or Anchor

$6.30

Add Pattern to Cart

Stuff to Do

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Well, this describes me on most days!

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:133w x 100

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.30

Add Pattern to Cart

All Day

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Well, that seems to be my activity a lot lately.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:105w x 121

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:4 colors Anchor for DMC

$6.30

Add Pattern to Cart

Growing Old

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Well, yeah I did - it just crept up on me. Maybe you're the same way - or know someone who is. Doesn't hurt to add a bit of humor!!

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:84w x 90

Fabric:14ct. Aida white

Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.30

Add Pattern to Cart

Without Coffee

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Yes, I'm a self confessed coffee addict, and anyone who knows me knows that - so friends are always teasing me. That's okay - just don't...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:90w x 78

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC

$6.30

Add Pattern to Cart

Professional Help

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

We probably all need professional help at some point - but I could use these on a daily basis :-)

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:100w x 73

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:4 colors DMC or Anchor floss

$6.30

Add Pattern to Cart

Bench Press a Buick

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

I've felt that way sometimes. Great chart to remind yourself how strong you really are - or a great gift for that super friend. Counted...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:117w x 95

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:DMC

$6.30

Add Pattern to Cart

Finally Got it Together

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Cute, fun chart - "Finally got it altogether, but I forgot where I put it."

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:113w x 107

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:3 colors DMC or Anchor

$6.30

Add Pattern to Cart

Owner vs Resume

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

If you have either a cat or dog you'll appreciate this chart. I have both and this fits pretty well.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:129w x 88

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:2 colors DMC or Anchor

$6.30

Add Pattern to Cart

Magic Beans

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals

Cute coffee design - Fairy tales and magic beans... turn me into a human.

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:97w x 66

Fabric:14ct. Aida Antique White

Floss:5 DMC or Anchor

$6.30

Add Pattern to Cart

Please Wait ...