Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Had My Coffee? by Iris Originals
Had My Coffee?
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Great and simple chart for the coffee addict. Why are you talking to me before I've had my coffee.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:106w x 136
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Slow Down Sparky by Iris Originals
Slow Down Sparky
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yeah, it's annoying to get old and not be able to move as fast as we once could. But.... I'm still moving and above the grass, so a lot to...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:114w x 115
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sunshine & Roses by Iris Originals
Sunshine & Roses
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Do you ever have days like that? I do and I suspect most of use do. Sunshine & Roses vs Rain Clouds, Donkey butts and Poison Ivy. ...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:78w x 96
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:7 DMC or Anchor colors
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Attitude Adjustment by Iris Originals
Attitude Adjustment
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
This may not apply to you - but it definitely does to me - attitude adjustment in a mug. How appropriate :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:91w x 67
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:7 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Water is Important by Iris Originals
Water is Important
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Without water you cannot make coffee - and I'm all about the coffee. This will make a cute little gift for that coffee lover in your life.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:93w x 69
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:7 DMC or Anchor colors
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I'm Sorry by Iris Originals
I'm Sorry
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
I'm Sorry, I ran out of Coffee, so today is cancelled. Easy chart - great for that coffee drinker.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:120w x 120
Fabric:14ct. Aida Antique White
Floss:9 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Successful Woman by Iris Originals
Successful Woman
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, the chart pretty much says it all! Yes, I'm a huge dog lover AND a pretty big coffee drinker. Cute chart for yourself or a friend.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:97w x 93
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 colors Anchor or D
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Magic Coffee by Iris Originals
Magic Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yes, I'm a coffee addict. I do love my coffee and I love to smell coffee. It is about as close to magic as you can get.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 94
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Best Friends & Coffee by Iris Originals
Best Friends & Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Best Friends don't care if your house is clean, they care if you have coffee. Great chart for coffee lovers.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:94w x 75
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee Understands by Iris Originals
Coffee Understands
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
I love coffee, and it always seems to cheer me up. Great gift for a coffee loving friend.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:92w x 115
Fabric:14ct. Aida Platinum
Floss:5 DMC or Anchor colors
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Seize the Day by Iris Originals
Seize the Day
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
This would definitely be me - "I'm gonna need more coffee before I seize anything". Cute coffee saying for your kitchen or as a gift for a...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:94w x 89
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Drink Coffee by Iris Originals
Drink Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well yeah - depends on how much you drink.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:106w x 63
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Dear Teacher by Iris Originals
Dear Teacher
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
This is dedicated to my youngest son - and very appropriate. Great for anyone who has this talkative child :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:85w x 71
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 skeins DMC or Anchor
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Instant Human by Iris Originals
Instant Human
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
"Instant Human - just add Coffee" Cute little chart for the coffee lover.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:83w x 47
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 DMC or Anchor
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Life Happens by Iris Originals
Life Happens
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, that's the way I feel a lot of mornings (and afternoons and evenings). Coffee always helps.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:75w x 61
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee Survivor by Iris Originals
Coffee Survivor
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Coffee Survivor - one who can ask for coffee in any language!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:89w x 78
Fabric:14ct. Fiddler's Cloth Oatmeal Lite
Floss:5 DMC or Anchor colors
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Hump Day by Iris Originals
Hump Day
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, if you know me - or have checked out my charts, you might know I'm a coffee addict. I know I'm not the only one - so this is great...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:99w x 123
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:7 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, But First, Coffee by Iris Originals
But First, Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
No explanation necessary - BUT FIRST, COFFEE! :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:85w x 45
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:2 colors Anchor or DMC floss
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Don't Exercise by Iris Originals
I Don't Exercise
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yeah, you know with me, coffee comes first. It's tricky to do anything with coffee in my cup.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:92w x 82
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:9 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Spilling Coffee by Iris Originals
Spilling Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
You know how a little kid is if their balloon gets away - well, that about says it all. Be careful - don't spill the coffee.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:98w x 83
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:10 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Lick the Frosting by Iris Originals
Lick the Frosting
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, that's what they tell me anyway - that muffins are healthy! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 93w x 79h. Stitched on...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:93w x 79
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Tossing & Turning by Iris Originals
Tossing & Turning
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Sounds like a good idea to me - I need all the exercise I can get! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 105w x 83. Stitched on...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:105w x 83
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:DMC Floss
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Dusted Once by Iris Originals
I Dusted Once
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well yeah - actually I've tried it several times - it ALWAYS comes back. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 90w x 86h. Stitched...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 86
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, My Thoughts by Iris Originals
My Thoughts
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
No - not necessarily a good thing. I have to work at it.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:91w x 106
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Young at Heart by Iris Originals
Young at Heart
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Think that about sums it up - for me at least.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:81w x 94
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:7 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, One Cup of Coffee by Iris Originals
One Cup of Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
What purpose does your coffee serve? Needless to say, I'm a coffeeholic. I love coffee and I love stitching about coffee. This will make...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:113w x 101
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 DMC or Anchor
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Housework by Iris Originals
Housework
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
They say housework won't kill you! But why take the chance? Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 86 x 80. Model stitched on 14...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:86w x 80
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 DMC colors
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Out of Supplies by Iris Originals
Out of Supplies
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
We all know we're NOT going to run out of supplies. May get down low - but run out - can usually go into the 'stash' and find something.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:148w x 137
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Do Not Disturb by Iris Originals
Do Not Disturb
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yup, proceed with caution - especially on some days. This makes a great gift for a friend.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:114w x 148
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Safe Place by Iris Originals
Safe Place
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Oh yeah - that happens to me ALL THE TIME. I need one space designated as "safe place" and put everything there. :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:91w x 93
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Old Age by Iris Originals
Old Age
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
This applies both literally and figuratively. It IS hard to get back up, whether you're actually on the floor, or... it feels like you...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:152w x 126
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Not My Dog by Iris Originals
Not My Dog
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yup, only MY dog gets to boss me around.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:94w x 79
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:2 colors Anchor or DMX
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Zip-A-Dee-Do-Dah by Iris Originals
Zip-A-Dee-Do-Dah
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Ever feel this way in the morning - Some days I'm moving about as fast as this little guy. Added him because my granddaughter loves...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:78w x 85
Fabric:14ct. picture this plus artic
Floss:9 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Best FRiend by Iris Originals
Best FRiend
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Cute saying about your best friend - does she know too much - probably :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 93
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:6 DMC or Anchor colors
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, This Age by Iris Originals
This Age
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Oh yeah. I can attest to the fact that as I get older I can't do all the stuff I used to do or want to do - at least that's true with me. ...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:94w x 89
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee and Jesus by Iris Originals
Coffee and Jesus
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, this is definitely a true statement for me - and hopefully for you too.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:86w x 96
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Train of Thought by Iris Originals
Train of Thought
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yeah, and this is happening way too often~!!!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 119
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, So Much to Do by Iris Originals
So Much to Do
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Pretty much says it all -
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:93w x 94
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, My Little Dog by Iris Originals
My Little Dog
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
And, this is SO TRUE of my little dog. He is barking as I type - probably because a cricket jumped outside. But, he's a sweetie, small...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:111w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida Aida
Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Warrior Queen by Iris Originals
Warrior Queen
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yup, that's me - older and meaner all the time. I like the title "Warrior Queen"
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:92w x 92
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Your Eyesight by Iris Originals
Your Eyesight
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, that's pretty much me these days - how about you??
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:88w x 93
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:7 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Amaze Myself by Iris Originals
Amaze Myself
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yeah, that just happens some days!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:108w x 109
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 colors Anhor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Had Coffee by Iris Originals
Had Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yup, that's about it for today.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:97w x 96
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Freshly Brewed Coffee by Iris Originals
Freshly Brewed Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Don't you just love the smell of freshly brewed coffee - or maybe you're not a coffeeholic like me. Anyway, this makes a great little...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:121w x 79
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:6 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A Nap by Iris Originals
A Nap
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Oh yeah! I used to be the energizer bunny - but NOW - I love my naps.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:125w x 105
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC floss
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Get Up from the Sofa by Iris Originals
Get Up from the Sofa
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
And sometimes three - but life is good. Glad to be alive!!!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:120w x 115
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I'm a Classic by Iris Originals
I'm a Classic
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, getting old does have it's benefits - I'm still above the grass - BUT, I'm also becoming a "classic".
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:106w x 97
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 color Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee Prevents Injuries by Iris Originals
Coffee Prevents Injuries
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Cute coffee saying - if you love coffee, or know someone who does, this makes a great little gift or saying near your coffee pot.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:101w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:10 colors DMC or Anchor fllss
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Something Soup by Iris Originals
Something Soup
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Never underestimate a woman with a crockpot and a can of cream of something soup. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 111 x 104....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:111w x 104
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:8 DMC colors
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Lids on Jars by Iris Originals
Lids on Jars
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, this seems to be an everyday occasion in my life - anytime I'm faced with a jar, bottle or whatever needs to be opened. Yeah, I know...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:89w x 85
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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