Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns | Everything Cross Stitch

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Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.

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Bathroom Concierge Kitty Cat

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Add a little humor to your bathroom with this adorable design featuring a curious cat and a message every cat owner knows is all too true....

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:96w x 96

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series I - Hold On Let Me Over Think This

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

For anyone whose brain never seems to hit the pause button, this witty design perfectly captures the art of overthinking. Counted cross...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:109w x 160

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series I - Sorry! I Don't Take Orders I Barely Take Suggestions

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

For those who prefer to do things their own way, this witty design delivers plenty of sass and humor. Counted cross stitch pattern....

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:109w x 160

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series I - Be Happy it Drives People Crazy

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A colorful reminder to choose happiness and let go of what others think. This uplifting design is perfect for anyone who embraces life with...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:109w x 160

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series I - Born to Argue

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

For those who always have a comeback ready, this colorful and humorous design is perfect for anyone who proudly admits they were simply...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:109w x 160

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series I - Caution I Have No Filter

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

For those who proudly speak their mind, this playful design features a bold "I Have No Filter" warning that's perfect for adding a little...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:109w x 160

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series I - I Run a Tight Shipwreck

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

For anyone who's ever felt like they're barely keeping it together, this nautical-inspired design delivers the perfect dose of humor. A fun...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:109w x 160

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series I - I'm Not Weird I'm Limited Edition

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Celebrate what makes you unique with this bright and uplifting design! A fun reminder that you're not weird—you're simply one of a kind and...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:109w x 160

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series I - Ugliness can be fixed. Stupidity is forever.

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A little sarcastic, a little sassy, and guaranteed to get a laugh! This witty design is perfect for anyone who appreciates sharp humor and...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:109w x 160

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series II - Be a Stiletto in Room of Flats

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Stand out from the crowd with this fun and empowering design featuring the inspiring reminder to "Be a Stiletto in a Room of Flats." A...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:140w x 99

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series II - I'm Just a Person Standing in Front of a Salad Asking it to Be a Donut

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Life's toughest decisions are sometimes the sweetest! This humorous design is perfect for anyone who has ever wished a salad would...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:140w x 99

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series II - Looks Aren't Everything But I Have Them Just in Case

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

For the beauty lovers who know mascara solves almost everything! This fun and fashionable design is perfect for anyone who believes life's...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:140w x 99

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series I - Eye Rolling is My Cardio

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Perfect for anyone fluent in sarcasm, this colorful design features the hilarious phrase, "Eye Rolling Is My Cardio." A fun stitch that's...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:109w x 160

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series I - It's a Beautiful Day to Leave Me Alone

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A cheerful reminder to embrace each day with a positive outlook, this uplifting design encourages you to focus on the sunshine and leave...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:109w x 160

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series I - It's Okay if You Don't Like Me. Not Everyone Has Good Taste.

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A little sassy and full of confidence, this humorous design is perfect for anyone who believes that not everyone has good taste. A fun...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:109w x 160

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series II - Butt First Coffee

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Start your day with a smile and a cup of coffee! This playful design featuring a mischievous cat is the perfect stitch for coffee lovers...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:140w x 99

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series II - Come to the Dark Side We Have Cookies

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

oin the fun side with this cheeky design featuring the irresistible invitation, "Come to the Dark Side... We Have Cookies." A playful...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:140w x 99

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series II - I Don't Like Morning People. Or People. Or Mornings.

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Not a morning person? This hilarious design says it all! Perfect for anyone who needs coffee before conversation and isn't afraid to admit...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:140w x 99

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series II - I Eat Cake Because It's Somebody's Birthday Somewhere

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Life's too short to skip dessert! This colorful and lighthearted design is perfect for anyone who believes it's always somebody's birthday...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:140w x 99

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series II - Kiss My Sass

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A little bold, a little sassy, and guaranteed to get a laugh! This playful design is perfect for anyone with a feisty sense of humor and a...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:140w x 99

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series II - Sarcasm Level Expert

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

For those who have mastered the art of witty comebacks, this hilarious design features a "Sarcasm Level: Expert" meter that's perfect for...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:140w x 99

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Sassy Threads Series II - Zero Meows Given

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Perfect for cat lovers with a sassy streak, this playful design features the cheeky phrase "Zero Meows Given." A fun stitch that's sure to...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:140w x 99

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Teardrop Ornament - Life Is Better In A Hot Tub

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

From our Teardrop Ornament Series is LIFE IS BETTER IN A HOT TUB! Design is 39 stitches wide by 55 stitches high and designed by Marcia...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:39w x 55

Fabric:14ct. Perforated Paper White

OMG They Got Me a Whole Tree

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 63 x 78. Model stitched on 14ct fabric using DMC floss. Great project for perforated paper,...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:63w x 78

Fabric:14ct. Aida Vintage Blue Whisper

Valentine Gnome - Roses are Red ... BEER!

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Designed from exclusive licensed artwork by Art Matters Designs. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 98 x 128. Model stitched on...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:98w x 128

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Valentine Gnome Roses Are Red ... WINE!

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A wonderful Valentine GNOME Roses Are Red ... WINE! counted cross stitch design. Marcia Manning designed this from exclusive licensed...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:98w x 128

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by New York Dreamer

Laundry - the never ending cycle. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 115 x 90. Model stitched on 32ct Cocoa linen by Weeks Dye...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:115w x 90

Fabric:32ct. Linen Natural Light

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Five great Market Fresh Puns. Each is also available in single design leaflets. Counted cross stitch patterns. Stitch count within: 100 x...

Pattern Details:

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

Released: 9/11/2022

On Sale:$15.29

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Pillow Chat - GARDEN TRIO I

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Pillow Chat Series - GARDEN TRIO I. Three wonderful Garden / Plant themed designs. Full - coverall size is 54 stitches by 54 stitches....

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:54w x 54

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

Released: 3/13/2022

On Sale:$6.79

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Pillow Chat - GARDEN TRIO II

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Pillow Chat Series - GARDEN TRIO II. Three wonderful Garden / Plant themed designs. Full - coverall size is 54 stitches by 54 stitches....

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:54w x 54

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

Released: 3/13/2022

On Sale:$6.79

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Pillow Chat - GARDEN TRIO III

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Pillow Chat Series - GARDEN TRIO III. Three wonderful Garden / Plant themed designs. Full - coverall size is 54 stitches by 54 stitches....

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:54w x 54

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

Released: 3/13/2022

On Sale:$6.79

Add Pattern to Cart

Pillow Chat - PLANTS TRIO

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Pillow Chat Series - PLANTS TRIO. 3 wonderful Plants themed designs. Full - coverall size is 54 stitches by 54 stitches. Suggestion is if...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:54w x 54

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

This awesome WINE GNOME is great whether stitched by itself or along with the funny saying. Marcia Manning designed this from licensed...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:130w x 116

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

MS. BEER GNOME is great whether stitched by itself or along with the funny saying. Marcia Manning designed this from licensed artwork. Full...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:145w x 115

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

MR. BEER GNOME is great whether stitched by itself or along with the funny saying. Marcia Manning designed this from licensed artwork. Full...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:128w x 115

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

This adorable MARGARITA GNOME is great whether stitched by itself or along with the funny saying. Marcia Manning designed this from...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:130w x 117

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

This adorable BLOODY MARY GNOME is great whether stitched by itself or along with the funny saying. Marcia Manning designed this from...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:148w x 117

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

Released: 12/16/2021

On Sale:$6.79

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I Just Want To Drink .... CRAFT and Take Naps

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A great saying for any CRAFTING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... CRAFT and Take Naps! Included...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:100w x 90

Fabric:14ct. aida white

I Just Want To Drink .... CROCHET and Take Naps

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A great saying for any CROCHETING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... CROCHET and Take Naps!...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:100w x 900

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

Released: 10/21/2021

On Sale:$5.95

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I Just Want To Drink .... GO HUNTING and Take Naps

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A great saying for any HUNTING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... GO HUNTING and Take Naps!...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:100w x 90

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

Released: 10/21/2021

On Sale:$6.79

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I Just Want To Drink .... GARDEN and Take Naps

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A great saying for any GARDENING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... GARDEN and Take Naps!...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:100w x 90

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

Released: 10/21/2021

On Sale:$5.95

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I Just Want To Drink .... GAMBLE and Take Naps

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A great saying for any GAMBLING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... GAMBLE and Take Naps!...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:100w x 90

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A Fun Christmas Saying counted cross stitch design! Cross Stitch design by Marcia Manning. Design is 114 stitches wide by 120 stitches...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:114w x 120

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

Released: 10/8/2021

On Sale:$3.79

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue ... Poo

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

It's a sweet, humorous thank-you note from your furry friend—perfectly capturing that adorable blend of love and, well… responsibility....

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:118w x 139

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

I Just Want To Drink .... READ BOOKS and Take Naps

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A great saying for any READING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Tea (or Coffee, Beer, Wine, Cocktails) READ BOOKS and Take Naps! Included...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:100w x 90

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

I Just Want To Drink .... GO CAMPING and Take Naps

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A great saying for any CAMPING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails (or Coffee, Beer, Wine, Tea) GO CAMPING and Take Naps! Included...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:100w x 90

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

Released: 8/15/2021

On Sale:$5.95

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I Just Want To Drink .... SAVE ANIMALS and Take Naps

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A great saying for any ANIMAL / RESCUE / SHELTER enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Wine (or Coffee, Beer, Tea, Cocktails) SAVE ANIMALS and...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:100w x 90

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

Released: 8/15/2021

On Sale:$5.95

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I Just Want To Drink .... CROSS STITCH and Take Naps

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A wonderful saying for any CROSS STITCH enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Coffee (or Beer, Tea, Wine, Cocktails) CROSS STITCH and Take Naps!...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:100w x 90

Fabric:14ct. Aida White

I Just Want To Drink .... GO FISHING and Take Naps

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

A great saying for any FISHING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Beer (or Coffee, Tea, Wine, Cocktails) GO FISHING and Take Naps! Included...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:100w x 90

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

Released: 8/14/2021

On Sale:$5.95

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Imagine a world where FABRIC is FREE and CROSS STITCH makes you THIN

a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders

Imagine a world where FABRIC is FREE and CROSS STITCH makes you THIN! An awesome saying that surely makes one smile. :-) Original...

Pattern Details:

Stitch Count:228w x 150

Floss:DMC

Designer:Marcia Manning

Released: 1/28/2021

On Sale:$8.49

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