Funny Phrases: Cross Stitch Patterns & Kits

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Grumpy Sign by Artists Alley
Grumpy Sign
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artists Alley
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:174w x 101
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Why Worry? by X's & Oh's
Why Worry?
a Cross Stitch Pattern by X's & Oh's
"I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol!" Model stitched on 28 ct Antique white Jobelan using DMC floss. Stitch count 93x60.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:93w x 60
Fabric:28ct. Jobelan Antique White
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Kitty Approved 2 by Artists Alley
Kitty Approved 2
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artists Alley
a counted cross-stitch design featuring a cat-themed subject, available as a physical pattern leaflet. It is characterized as a detailed...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:225w x 134
Fabric:14ct. Aida Ice Blue
Floss:DMC
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Make Me Shine by X's & Oh's
Make Me Shine
a Cross Stitch Pattern by X's & Oh's
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:101w x 161
Fabric:28ct. Jobelan Ivory
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Kits, The Queen by Design Works
The Queen
a Cross Stitch Kit by Design Works
Beautiful designs and top quality materials make Tobin one of the top cross stitch kit makers worldwide. This package contains 14-count...
Kit Details:
Size:5"x7"
$9.99
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Cross Stitch Kits, My Mess by Design Works
Currently Out of Stock
My Mess
a Cross Stitch Kit by Design Works
TOBIN-Counted Cross Stitch Kit. Beautiful designs and top quality materials make Tobin one of the top cross stitch kit makers worldwide....
Kit Details:
Size:5"x7"
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:Embroidery floss
$9.99
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Cross Stitch Patterns, More Alcohol by Peacock & Fig
More Alcohol
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
This calls for more alcohol. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 120 x 70. Model stitched on 32ct Light Mint Splash Lugana by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:120w x 70
Fabric:32ct. Lugana
Floss:6 DMC colors
$9.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, One to Even by Peacock & Fig
One to Even
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
I’m sure you’ve had those moments where something so insanely stupid comes up and you’re like “I can’t even… I just literally cannot...
Pattern Details:
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
$9.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Laundry....Again? by New York Dreamer
Laundry....Again?
a Cross Stitch Pattern by New York Dreamer
Laundry - the never ending cycle. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 115 x 90. Model stitched on 32ct Cocoa linen by Weeks Dye...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:115w x 90
Fabric:32ct. Linen Natural Light
Floss:9 DMC colors
On Sale:$9.80
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Cross Stitch Patterns, WordyBirds - June by Sweet Wing Studio
WordyBirds - June
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sweet Wing Studio
Flamingos prance on the beach in the 6th of the WordyBirds series! Perfectly beachy and fun for the month of June. Pattern is stitched...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:119w x 71
Fabric:32ct. Linen Vintage Stormy Clouds
Floss:DMC
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Here For The Candy by Crafty Bluebonnet Designs
Here For The Candy
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Crafty Bluebonnet Designs
A sweet and spooky Halloween design featuring a playful “Just Here for the Candy” saying, complete with a candy corn accent, spider and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:47w x 46
Fabric:28ct. Linen Pearl Gray
Floss:DMC Floss
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, It Takes a Village by Imaginating
It Takes a Village
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Parenting humor at its best, because where is that village when you need it? A lighthearted stitch for anyone who's ever felt outnumbered...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:110w x 130
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 DMC colors
Multiple styles available
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Not My Monkeys by Imaginating
Not My Monkeys
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 130 x 174. Model stitched on 14ct White Aida using DMC floss.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:130w x 174
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:14 DMC colors
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A Cluttered Kitchen by Sue Hillis Designs
A Cluttered Kitchen
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
A Cluttered Kitchen is a happy kitchen and this one is delirious! When stitched on 14 count fabric or "over two" on 28 count, fits into an...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:125w x 97
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Strong Women by Sue Hillis Designs
Strong Women
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
Women are like Teabags - We never know how strong we are until we are in hot water. When stitched on 14 count fabric or "over two" on 28...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:125w x 97
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Ruin Your Day by Imaginating
Ruin Your Day
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
This moody little stitch features a frazzled heroine, her concerned pup and the ultimate sarcastic mantra for those days when you're just...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:110w x 145
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
Multiple styles available
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Loads of Fun (Laundry Company2) by Hands on Design
Loads of Fun (Laundry Company2)
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Hands on Design
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Signier Sign by Imaginating
Signier Sign
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Sometimes the universe just needs to be a little more obvious! This humorous design features a woman searching for answers while a stack of...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 139
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
Multiple styles available
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Your Opinion by Imaginating
Your Opinion
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Your Opinion" is for the unapologetically bold! Featuring a confident woman with one hand on her hip and the other dismissively raised,...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:97w x 125
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 DMC floss colors
Multiple styles available
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Eyeroll by Imaginating
Eyeroll
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Features a frazzled woman at her desk, clearly done with it all, with the hilarious phrase, “One of these days I'm going to eyeroll myself...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:102w x 129
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:6 DMC colors
Multiple styles available
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Friendly Advice by Imaginating
Friendly Advice
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Witty, relatable, and just a little too real, this clever design perfectly captures the inner panic we all feel before hitting “send.” With...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:81w x 136
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
Multiple styles available
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Ex-People Person by Imaginating
Ex-People Person
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
This cheeky pattern features the phrase “I used to be a people person but people ruined it for me”, with a no-nonsense lady throwing up the...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:99w x 121
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 DMC colors
Multiple styles available
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Queen: She Who Must Be Obeyed by PinoyStitch
Queen: She Who Must Be Obeyed
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Mini Cross Stitch Pattern: Queen: She Who Must Be Obeyed Design Source: Antique Chart Adaptation DMC Floss...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:135w x 177
Fabric:14ct. Aida Red
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 1
Multiple styles available
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Chocolate Is Proof by Stitchnmomma
Chocolate Is Proof
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
A quirky, easy-to-stitch piece for any chocolate lover. Or why not make it as a gift for the chocolate lover in your life.
Pattern Details:
Size:5.71" x 5.43"
Floss:5 DMC Cotton Colors
Designer:Kelly Myers
$9.00
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