Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Respect for my Elders by Iris Originals
Respect for my Elders
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
True statement - for me at least. Easy stitch, cute as a gift.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:96w x 108
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Resting Beach Face by Hands on Design
Resting Beach Face
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Hands on Design
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Retired by Iris Originals
Retired
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
What do you call a person who is happy on Monday - Retired. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 91 x 91. Model stitched on 14ct...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:91w x 91
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:6 DMC colors
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Retro Mom's Roadkill Diner by PinoyStitch
Retro Mom's Roadkill Diner
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Mini Cross Stitch Pattern: Retro Mom's Roadkill Diner Design Source: Andy Nortnik DMC Floss Colors: 4 Stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:156w x 155
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 4
Multiple styles available
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Ride the Broom by Imaginating
Ride the Broom
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Add a dash of spooky fun to your stitching with "Ride The Broom!" This playful cross stitch design features a witch’s skirt with striped...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:94w x 122
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:14 DMC colors
Multiple styles available
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Ring the Bell by Artists Alley
Ring the Bell
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artists Alley
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:131w x 75
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Rise & Shine by Iris Originals
Rise & Shine
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Don't know about you - but I'm thinking I'm not the only one that isn't bright eyed when she gets out of bed. Great chart for a friend who...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:77w x 94
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Rise & Whine by X's & Oh's
Rise & Whine
a Cross Stitch Pattern by X's & Oh's
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Rolling Eyes by Iris Originals
Rolling Eyes
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
"I'm sorry, did I roll my eyes out loud?" I'm sure you never do that - unfortunately I do it frequently so this is an appropriate saying...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:80w x 112
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC floss
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Roses are Red Violets are Blue ... Poo by Cross Stitch Wonders
Roses are Red Violets are Blue ... Poo
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
It's a sweet, humorous thank-you note from your furry friend—perfectly capturing that adorable blend of love and, well… responsibility....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:118w x 139
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Rough Week by Iris Originals
Rough Week
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
"It's been a rough week. But on a positive side I didn't need any bail money and i didn't have to hide any bodies." Cute saying for...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:95w x 126
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Ruin Your Day by Imaginating
Ruin Your Day
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
When life rains on your parade, grab your umbrella, scowl proudly, and remember—ruining your day is a you job. This moody little stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:110w x 145
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
Multiple styles available
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Safe Place by Iris Originals
Safe Place
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Oh yeah - that happens to me ALL THE TIME. I need one space designated as "safe place" and put everything there. :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:91w x 93
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Samplers Since 1675 by Peacock & Fig
Samplers Since 1675
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Putting a cheeky twist on the beautiful and sometimes “strained” history of samplers, the Samplers Since 1675 cross stitch pattern is sure...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:65w x 85
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
$8.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Santa's Helpers by Sue Hillis Designs
Santa's Helpers
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
Features colorful Christmas cocktails beneath the phrase “Santa’s Real Helpers.” With its bright colors, charming details, and lighthearted...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:67w x 67
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:12 DMC colors
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sarcasm by Rogue Stitchery
Sarcasm
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
This pattern is a front-and-back, single-page (double-sided) pattern. The cover page is in full color and contains a photo of the stitched...
Pattern Details:
Size:8-1/8w X 4-1/8h in
Fabric:0
$3.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sarcasm by Peacock & Fig
Sarcasm
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
This fun cross stitch pattern reminds you that sarcasm is the perfect answer to any stupid question you may get asked.
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Fun Mom - Mama Needs A Beer by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Fun Mom - Mama Needs A Beer
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great Sassy Fun Mom Words Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this Sassy Fun Mom cross stitch design from artwork by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 78
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Fun Mom - May Your Coffee ... by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Fun Mom - May Your Coffee ...
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great Sassy Fun Mom Words Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this Sassy Fun Mom cross stitch design from artwork by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:94w x 100
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Fun Mom - Messy Bun .... by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Fun Mom - Messy Bun ....
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great Sassy Fun Mom Words Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this Sassy Fun Mom cross stitch design from artwork by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:99w x 89
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady A Stitch a Day by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady A Stitch a Day
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Mini Cross Stitch Pattern: Sassy Lady A Stitch a Day Design Source: PinoyStitch DMC Floss Colors: 13 Stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:58w x 50
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 13
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Burnt Meals by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Burnt Meals
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross stitch Sassy Ladies speak their mind! Designed retro style with quirky quotes for a fun project. Easy stitch, mostly full stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:59w x 59
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 13
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Care by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Care
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross stitch Sassy Ladies speak their mind! Designed retro style with quirky quotes for a fun project. Easy stitch, mostly full stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:59w x 49
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 13
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Coffee by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross stitch Sassy Ladies speak their mind! Designed retro style with quirky quotes for a fun project. Easy stitch, mostly full stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:57w x 49
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 11
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Give a Damn by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Give a Damn
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Mini Cross Stitch Pattern: Sassy Lady Give a Damn Design Source: PInoyStitch DMC Floss Colors: 14 Stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:57w x 49
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 14
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Happy Hour by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Happy Hour
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross stitch Sassy Ladies speak their mind! Designed retro style with quirky quotes for a fun project. Easy stitch, mostly full stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:55w x 49
Fabric:14
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 12
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Knit Happens by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Knit Happens
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross stitch Sassy Ladies speak their mind! Designed retro style with quirky quotes for a fun project. Easy stitch, mostly full...
Pattern Details:
Size:4 w x 4 h Inches
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 12
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Nurse by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Nurse
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross stitch Sassy Ladies speak their mind! Designed retro style with quirky quotes for a fun project. Easy stitch, mostly full...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:60w x 49
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 11
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Opinion by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Opinion
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross stitch Sassy Ladies speak their mind! Designed retro style with quirky quotes for a fun project. Easy stitch, mostly full...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:58w x 49
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 12
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Sarcasm by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Sarcasm
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross stitch Sassy Ladies speak their mind! Designed retro style with quirky quotes for a fun project. Easy stitch, mostly full stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:58w x 49
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 12
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Secret Recipe by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Secret Recipe
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:59w x 49
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 12
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Ugly Xmas Sweater by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Ugly Xmas Sweater
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross stitch Sassy Ladies speak their mind! Designed retro style with quirky quotes for a fun project. Easy stitch, mostly full stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:58w x 50
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 13
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Lady Witch by PinoyStitch
Sassy Lady Witch
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross stitch Sassy Ladies speak their mind! Designed retro style with quirky quotes for a fun project. Easy stitch, mostly full stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:57w x 49
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss Colors: 11
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy since birth by Kiokiz
Sassy since birth
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:74w x 63
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Schools Out - Goodbye Lesson Plan Hello Sun Tan by Cross Stitch Wonders
Schools Out - Goodbye Lesson Plan Hello Sun Tan
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great SCHOOLS OUT Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 98 stitches wide by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:98w x 96
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Schools Out - See Ya Later Educator by Cross Stitch Wonders
Schools Out - See Ya Later Educator
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great SCHOOLS OUT Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 100 stitches wide by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 98
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Schools Out - Teacher Off Duty by Cross Stitch Wonders
Schools Out - Teacher Off Duty
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great SCHOOLS OUT Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 98 stitches wide by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:98w x 68
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Schools Out - Teachers Care To The Core by Cross Stitch Wonders
Schools Out - Teachers Care To The Core
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great SCHOOLS OUT Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 98 stitches wide by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:98w x 67
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Schools Out - The End Is Near #hellosummer by Cross Stitch Wonders
Schools Out - The End Is Near #hellosummer
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great SCHOOLS OUT Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 96 stitches wide by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:96w x 98
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Seashells & Snowflakes by Stoney Creek
Seashells & Snowflakes
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stoney Creek
Stitch count 56w x 84h, approximately 4" x 6" on 14ct. Model stitched on 28ct touch of ecru hand-dyed Stoney Creek fabric over 2 threads....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:56w x 84
Fabric:28ct. Jobelan Antique White
$8.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Seize the Day by Iris Originals
Seize the Day
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
This would definitely be me - "I'm gonna need more coffee before I seize anything". Cute coffee saying for your kitchen or as a gift for a...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:94w x 89
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Seriously by Iris Originals
Seriously
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
About right - have YOU ever looked at someone and thought that? :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:6w x 5
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:7 skeins DMC or Anchor
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sewing Room by Iris Originals
Sewing Room
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
This actually applies to my sewing room, craft area, office - wherever - and let's don't forget the room where our cross stitch stash is!!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:105w x 158
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:9 colors Anchor or DMC
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sexy Chick by Peacock & Fig
Sexy Chick
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Inspired by a vintage illustration, this sweet little retro cross stitch pattern is perfect for any home decor or office.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:112w x 75
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$8.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Shake Your Tail by Alessandra Adelaide Needleworks
Shake Your Tail
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Alessandra Adelaide Needleworks
AAN Privee Collection - Shake your bunny tail. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 122 x 123. Model stitched on White fabric using...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:122w x 123
Fabric:18ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, She Betta Don't by Peacock & Fig
She Betta Don't
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
If you’ve ever caught yourself slaving away on some completely inane task like sweeping up after the kids for what feels like the fifteenth...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:65w x 85
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
$8.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, She Who MUST Be Obeyed by Artecy Cross Stitch
She Who MUST Be Obeyed
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artecy Cross Stitch
This counted cross stitch pattern was designed from the beautiful artwork of Gail Gastfield. Only full cross stitches are used in this...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:148w x 148
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:38 DMC colors
$15.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sheet-Faced by Artists Alley
Sheet-Faced
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artists Alley
A cheeky, modern design with a bold sense of humor. Featuring an adorably unapologetic character and the phrase “Let’s get sheet-faced,”...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:65w x 49
Fabric:14ct. Aida Lambswool
Floss:DMC Floss
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Shit Happens by White Willow Stitching
Shit Happens
a Cross Stitch Pattern by White Willow Stitching
Calling all those with a twisted sense of humor. StitchBitch has made a simple fact of life come alive in cross stitch. No smell included!
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:4 DMC floss colors
Designer:StitchBitch
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Shiver Me Timbers by Sue Hillis Designs
Shiver Me Timbers
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
Part of the Pirates series. Arrrrhh - Shiver me timbers! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 99w x 125h. Model was stitched on...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:99w x 125
Fabric:14ct. Aida Pewter
Floss:DMC Floss
$9.00
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