Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Cross Stitch Patterns, The Elderly by Iris Originals
The Elderly
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yes, I am elderly - difficult to accept most of the time. But, what I need to do is suck it up and keep going. And hey, I woke up above...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:116w x 84
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, The Moon was Full by The Stitcherhood
The Moon was Full
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
The Moon Was Full, a pretty, fun and whimsical cross stitch pattern, perfect for Wiccans or anyone with a sense of humor.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:120w x 92
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:DMC #310 (black) and #648 (gray)
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, The Older I Get by Iris Originals
The Older I Get
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yeah, unfortunately that sign says it all.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:101w x 65
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, The Queen by Imaginating
The Queen
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 105 x 105. Model stitched on 14ct White Aida using DMC floss.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:105w x 105
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:10 DMC colors
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, The Reason I Wake up Early by Iris Originals
The Reason I Wake up Early
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
MY DOG - is the reason I wake up in the morning.... cute cross stitch for the dog lover in your life.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 84
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, The Witch is In by Artists Alley
The Witch is In
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artists Alley
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:116w x 80
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Thin Patience by Peacock & Fig
Thin Patience
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Are you sick of people-ing and your patience is wearing oh-so-thin? Help yourself cope with the daily grind with the demotivational Thin...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Things I Like by The Stitcherhood
Things I Like
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
Things I like is a fun and snarky cross stitch pattern for lovers of books, cats, cross stitching, and maybe a few people. Dog version...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:120w x 62
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC #3799 (dark gray), or colors of your choice
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Things in Life by White Willow Stitching
Things in Life
a Cross Stitch Pattern by White Willow Stitching
Things in Life is a fun and sassy cross stitch Backstitching is required but no fractional stitches makes it perfect for any fabric count....
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:16 DMC floss colors
Designer:Jamie Larson
$10.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, This Age by Iris Originals
This Age
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Oh yeah. I can attest to the fact that as I get older I can't do all the stuff I used to do or want to do - at least that's true with me. ...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:94w x 89
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Thrills & Spills by Peacock & Fig
Thrills & Spills
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Nothing says “retro cross stitch” like a little blast from Scandinavian design past… Remember in the 70’s when printed paper towels were...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:117w x 161
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Time and Friends by Iris Originals
Time and Friends
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
This is true for sure!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:79w x 102
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:9 colors Anchor or DMC
$7.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Time To Get Lit by Cross Stitch Wonders
Time To Get Lit
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great TIME TO GET LIT saying in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Original artwork by Tara Reed...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:118w x 135
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Tips for Falling Asleep by Iris Originals
Tips for Falling Asleep
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Don't ask me how I know this. Oh yeah, I've watched other members of my family do this. I would never think of doing it.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:108w x 98
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 skeins Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, To Drink Coffee by Sweet Wing Studio
To Drink Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sweet Wing Studio
For the true coffee lovers out there—this fun and cheeky design says it all! Bold lettering and cozy colors make this a perfect project to...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:59w x 90
Fabric:28ct. Lugana Mushroom
Floss:WDW, DMC and CCW
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, To Gno-Me... by Sue Hillis Designs
To Gno-Me...
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
To gno-me is to love me. When stitched on 14 count fabric or "over two" on 28 count, fits into a 5 inch by 7 inch frame. Heart button...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:60w x 90
Fabric:14ct. Aida Mystic Grey
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, To Have And To Fold by Silver Creek Samplers
To Have And To Fold
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Silver Creek Samplers
A humorous, vintage-inspired sampler that turns everyday chores into something worth smiling about. Featuring playful typography and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:49w x 98
Fabric:18ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss
$13.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Today's Mood by Iris Originals
Today's Mood
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, that's usually the case with me. Good way to start the day is with good coffee.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:103w x 95
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:11 colors Anchor or DMC
$7.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Today's Specials by Iris Originals
Today's Specials
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yup, that's the special many days - lack of sleep, up to early and definitely low on patience. :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:107w x 118
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Today's Workout by Cross Stitch Wonders
Today's Workout
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Hilarious WINE SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 146 stitches wide by 157...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:146w x 157
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Toilet Paper Fun by Artecy Cross Stitch
Toilet Paper Fun
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artecy Cross Stitch
This counted cross stitch pattern was designed from the beautiful artwork of Gail Gastfield. Only full cross stitches are used in this...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:230w x 221
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:55 DMC colors
$15.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Too Glam to Give a Damn by Peacock & Fig
Too Glam to Give a Damn
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Let your decor be voted the "best dressed" with this stunning snarky cross stitch pattern! Make any decor luxurious with Too Glam to Give a...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC, Kreinik
Designer:Peacock & Fig
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Too Much Coffee by Iris Originals
Too Much Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yes, I'm a coffee addict. Yes, I drink coffee all day. I'll bet you know someone that does the same thing. Perfect little chart for them.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:135w x 140
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:11 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Too Much Food by Artecy Cross Stitch
Too Much Food
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artecy Cross Stitch
This counted cross stitch pattern of Roosevelt the cat was designed from the beautiful artwork of Gail Gastfield. Only full cross stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:178w x 211
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:59 DMC colors
$15.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Too Tired by Iris Originals
Too Tired
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, that pretty well describes me these days. :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:88w x 87
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Tools by Iris Originals
Tools
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well yeah, both of those work pretty good. I keep them handy all the time. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 128 x 90. Model...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:128w x 90
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Tools of the Trade by Sue Hillis Designs
Tools of the Trade
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
The tools every pirate needs. When stitched on 14 count fabric or "over two" on 28 count, fits into an 8 inch by 10 inch frame. Three coin...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:99w x 126
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Tossing & Turning by Iris Originals
Tossing & Turning
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Sounds like a good idea to me - I need all the exercise I can get! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 105w x 83. Stitched on...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:105w x 83
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:DMC Floss
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Train of Thought by Iris Originals
Train of Thought
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yeah, and this is happening way too often~!!!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 119
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Turkey Crossing by Cross-Point Designs
Turkey Crossing
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross-Point Designs
Frame it or make it into a little pillow, this design will is sure to bring chuckles!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:60w x 60
Fabric:14ct. Aida Ivory
Floss:DMC
$4.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Underestimate Me by Imaginating
Underestimate Me
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
This black and white design by Mary Engelbreit brings some fun and wit to your stitching. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 95...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:95w x 118
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 DMC colors
Multiple styles available
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Unicorn by Kiokiz
Unicorn
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Kiokiz
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Unstoppable by Iris Originals
Unstoppable
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Unstoppable - if I could just get started. Unfortunately, that would be me on many days :-) Great gift for a busy friend - or stitch for...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:95w x 96
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 skeins Anchor or DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Unstoppable by Iris Originals
Unstoppable
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yup, sometimes that's the most difficult part - just getting startd.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 81
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Valentine Gnome Roses Are Red ... BEER! by Cross Stitch Wonders
Valentine Gnome Roses Are Red ... BEER!
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A wonderful Valentine GNOME Roses Are Red ... BEER! counted cross stitch design. Marcia Manning designed this from exclusive licensed...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:98w x 128
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Valentine Gnome Roses Are Red ... WINE! by Cross Stitch Wonders
Valentine Gnome Roses Are Red ... WINE!
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A wonderful Valentine GNOME Roses Are Red ... WINE! counted cross stitch design. Marcia Manning designed this from exclusive licensed...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:98w x 128
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Vision Problem by Iris Originals
Vision Problem
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
About right for a lot of days for me.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 78
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Vixen by Bobbie G Designs
Vixen
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Bobbie G Designs
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:88w x 91
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Vodka by Peacock & Fig
Vodka
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Whether you enjoy drinking vodka or not, the Vodka cross stitch pattern reminds you that we all have those days. This pattern also has a...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Waay Too Young by Iris Originals
Waay Too Young
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Believe me - I am too young to be this old! But, thankfully, I'm still above the grass.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:138w x 113
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Warning by Pine Glen Designs
Warning
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Pine Glen Designs
If you have been accused of having an "attitude" this is the sampler for you. Simply place this disclaimer in plain view and feel free to...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:80w x 80
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Warrior Queen by Iris Originals
Warrior Queen
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yup, that's me - older and meaner all the time. I like the title "Warrior Queen"
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:92w x 92
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Was It The Hare? by Val's Stuff
Was It The Hare?
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Val's Stuff
This whimsical spring design features a tall bunny surrounded by blooming flowers and fluttering butterflies. Paired with the playful...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:68w x 168
Fabric:32ct. Linen Lemon Yellow
Floss:DMC Floss, Weeks Dye Works
$11.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Water is Important by Iris Originals
Water is Important
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Without water you cannot make coffee - and I'm all about the coffee. This will make a cute little gift for that coffee lover in your life.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:93w x 69
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:7 DMC or Anchor colors
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, WD-40 by Iris Originals
WD-40
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, that pretty much says it for me lots of days.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:105w x 85
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:8 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Wedding Nights by Peacock & Fig
Wedding Nights
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
If you've ever wondered what to take to a bridal shower, then maybe this sassy marriage cross stitch pattern will be just what you're...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
$10.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Wednesday - friday by Iris Originals
Wednesday - friday
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Goodness - sometimes don't you just look at that calendar and think - or no, it's only Wednesday when I was ready for Friday?! This says...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:84w x 88
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 DMC or Anchor colors
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Weird by Iris Originals
Weird
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, it really is! Yes, I'm old - but in my mind I don't feel old. I suspect there are many like me. Great for yourself or gift for a...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:101w x 76
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, What Are Boys by Homespun Elegance Ltd
What Are Boys
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Homespun Elegance Ltd
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
$7.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, What Are Girls by Homespun Elegance Ltd
What Are Girls
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Homespun Elegance Ltd
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
$7.50
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