Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee-isms #8 by Stitchnmomma
Coffee-isms #8
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
A fun and relatable design for coffee lovers who know that a little caffeine can make any conversation better! Counted cross stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:39w x 36
Fabric:32ct. Linen Cream
Floss:DMC Floss
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee-isms #9 by Stitchnmomma
Coffee-isms #9
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
A fun and charming design for coffee lovers who know that a freshly brewed cup is truly the language of love! Counted cross stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:55w x 48
Fabric:32ct. Linen Cream
Floss:DMC Floss
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Feral by Stitchnmomma
Feral
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
Is it meno-rage? Is it acute sleep deprivation? Is it the current state of our country? I don’t know, but I know it has been my current...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:65w x 28
Fabric:28ct. Linen
Floss:DMC Floss
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Glitter Over Gloom by Stitchnmomma
Glitter Over Gloom
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
A simple yet uplifting reminder to keep shining through life's tougher moments. This inspiring design encourages you to choose glitter over...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:54w x 72
Fabric:32ct. Linen
Floss:Your Choice
$8.40
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Skip the Fries by Stitchnmomma
Skip the Fries
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
Never skip the fries, sometimes they are the best part. *NOTES ABOUT THE STITCHED MODEL* I stitched the model on a cotton french fry...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:77w x 85
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.20
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Cross Stitch Patterns, It's All About the Stash by Sambrie Stitches Designs
It's All About the Stash
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sambrie Stitches Designs
Features colorful stitching motifs, cheerful accents and the perfectly honest phrase “It's all about the stash!”. Celebrates the joy of...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:69w x 69
Fabric:18ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Black Friday Queen by Alessandra Adelaide Needleworks
Black Friday Queen
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Alessandra Adelaide Needleworks
Rule the biggest shopping day of the year with this fun and festive design! Perfect for Black Friday enthusiasts who proudly wear the title...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:132w x 135
Fabric:32ct. Linen White
Floss:DMC Floss
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - Be Happy it Drives People Crazy by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - Be Happy it Drives People Crazy
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A colorful reminder to choose happiness and let go of what others think. This uplifting design is perfect for anyone who embraces life with...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - Born to Argue by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - Born to Argue
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
For those who always have a comeback ready, this colorful and humorous design is perfect for anyone who proudly admits they were simply...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - Eye Rolling is My Cardio by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - Eye Rolling is My Cardio
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Perfect for anyone fluent in sarcasm, this colorful design features the hilarious phrase, "Eye Rolling Is My Cardio." A fun stitch that's...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - Hold On Let Me Over Think This by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - Hold On Let Me Over Think This
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
For anyone whose brain never seems to hit the pause button, this witty design perfectly captures the art of overthinking. A fun and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - I Run a Tight Shipwreck by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - I Run a Tight Shipwreck
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
For anyone who's ever felt like they're barely keeping it together, this nautical-inspired design delivers the perfect dose of humor. A fun...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - It's a Beautiful Day to Leave Me Alone by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - It's a Beautiful Day to Leave Me Alone
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A cheerful reminder to embrace each day with a positive outlook, this uplifting design encourages you to focus on the sunshine and leave...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - It's Okay if You Don't Like Me. Not Everyone Has Good Taste. by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - It's Okay if You Don't Like Me. Not Everyone Has Good Taste.
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A little sassy and full of confidence, this humorous design is perfect for anyone who believes that not everyone has good taste. A fun...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - Sorry! I Don't Take Orders I Barely Take Suggestions by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - Sorry! I Don't Take Orders I Barely Take Suggestions
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
For those who prefer to do things their own way, this witty design delivers plenty of sass and humor. A fun stitch that's perfect for...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Butt First Coffee by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Butt First Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Start your day with a smile and a cup of coffee! This playful design featuring a mischievous cat is the perfect stitch for coffee lovers...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Come to the Dark Side We Have Cookies by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Come to the Dark Side We Have Cookies
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
oin the fun side with this cheeky design featuring the irresistible invitation, "Come to the Dark Side... We Have Cookies." A playful...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - I Don't Like Morning People. Or People. Or Mornings. by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - I Don't Like Morning People. Or People. Or Mornings.
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Not a morning person? This hilarious design says it all! Perfect for anyone who needs coffee before conversation and isn't afraid to admit...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - I Eat Cake Because It's Somebody's Birthday Somewhere by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - I Eat Cake Because It's Somebody's Birthday Somewhere
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Life's too short to skip dessert! This colorful and lighthearted design is perfect for anyone who believes it's always somebody's birthday...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Kiss My Sass by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Kiss My Sass
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A little bold, a little sassy, and guaranteed to get a laugh! This playful design is perfect for anyone with a feisty sense of humor and a...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Sarcasm Level Expert by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Sarcasm Level Expert
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
For those who have mastered the art of witty comebacks, this hilarious design features a "Sarcasm Level: Expert" meter that's perfect for...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Zero Meows Given by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Zero Meows Given
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Perfect for cat lovers with a sassy streak, this playful design features the cheeky phrase "Zero Meows Given." A fun stitch that's sure to...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Don't Die by Mary Engelbreit Cross Stitch Pattern by Spot Colors
Don't Die by Mary Engelbreit Cross Stitch Pattern
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Spot Colors
A little dark humor with a clever twist! Featuring a mischievous opossum and a playful reminder to "Don't Die Before You're Dead," this...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:96w x 121
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Please Hesitate by Mary Engelbreit Cross Stitch Pattern by Spot Colors
Please Hesitate by Mary Engelbreit Cross Stitch Pattern
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Spot Colors
A witty design with a touch of dark humor, featuring woodland friends and the playful phrase, "And Please Hesitate to Call Me." Perfect for...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:121w x 104
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Winter Driving Tips by Imaginating
Winter Driving Tips
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
A humorous winter-themed design featuring a playful driving quote and whimsical stitched artwork. Perfect for adding a lighthearted touch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:98w x 138
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
Multiple styles available
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Chocolate Resistance by Erica Michaels Designs
Chocolate Resistance
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Erica Michaels Designs
Personally, for me there is no resistance happening whatsoever - but perhaps that's easier for others! This quick-to-stitch design is just...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:141w x 47
Fabric:36ct. Linen Vintage Country Mocha
Floss:Weeks Dye Works
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Fab Frog by Rebel Stitcher Designs
Fab Frog
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rebel Stitcher Designs
Cross stitch pattern from Rebel Stitcher featuring a frog in underpants with an umbrella and the phrase "Stay weird and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:129w x 145
Fabric:32ct. Linen Silvery Moon
Floss:DMC, Classic Color Works
$15.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, All You Need is Coffee by Alessandra Adelaide Needleworks
All You Need is Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Alessandra Adelaide Needleworks
All you need is ... coffee aroma, coffee scent, coffee taste, coffee strength ... Coffee! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 127...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:127w x 132
Fabric:18ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$16.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Wine-y Stitchers by Barefoot Needleart
Wine-y Stitchers
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Barefoot Needleart
Cross stitch pattern from Barefoot Needleart featuring a wine bottle and the phrase, 'All my friends are wine-y Stitchers". Pattern is...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:143w x 104
Fabric:28ct. Lugana Whisper
Floss:DMC, Classic Color Works, Weeks Dye Works
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Shake Your Tail by Alessandra Adelaide Needleworks
Shake Your Tail
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Alessandra Adelaide Needleworks
AAN Privee Collection - Shake your bunny tail. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 122 x 123. Model stitched on White fabric using...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:122w x 123
Fabric:18ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Teardrop Ornament - Life Is Better In A Hot Tub by Cross Stitch Wonders
Teardrop Ornament - Life Is Better In A Hot Tub
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
From our Teardrop Ornament Series is LIFE IS BETTER IN A HOT TUB! Design is 39 stitches wide by 55 stitches high and designed by Marcia...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:39w x 55
Fabric:14ct. Perforated Paper White
Floss:DMC
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Bakers Pro Tip by Imaginating
Bakers Pro Tip
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
A sweet (and slightly unhinged) reminder that cake is best enjoyed immediately. This playful cross-stitch pattern features a happy baker,...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:95w x 146
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$7.65
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Anxious by Lucy Beam
Anxious
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Lucy Beam
A heartfelt, gently humorous design that blends honesty with charm. Featuring delicate florals and the candid phrase “Pray for me, I’m...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:97w x 95
Fabric:36ct. Linen
Floss:Gentle Art Sampler Threads, DMC Floss
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Barefoot by Rosewood Manor
Barefoot
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rosewood Manor
Cross stitch pattern from Rosewood Manor featuring the phrase "If you are not barefoot, then you are overdressed"! Pattern is stitched...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:80w x 60
Fabric:32ct. Linen White
Floss:DMC
$7.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Pants by Rebel Stitcher Designs
Pants
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rebel Stitcher Designs
This is a printed cross stitch pattern by Rebel Stitcher Designs. It features a whimsical design that says 'I can't decide what pants to...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:136w x 99
Fabric:40ct. Linen
Floss:Classic Color Works
$15.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, When I Was a Kid #2 by Iris Originals
When I Was a Kid #2
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
When I waw a Kid - actually 2nd chart saying the same thing - shows you where my brain miht be
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:79w x 80
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:9 colors Anchor or DMC floss
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I'd Pick You by Sambrie Stitches Designs
I'd Pick You
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sambrie Stitches Designs
"I'd Pick You" by SamBrie Stitches Designs is a charming, small-format cross stitch pattern featuring ripe strawberries, delicate blossoms,...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:71w x 39
Fabric:18ct. Aida China White
Floss:Classic Colorworks or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Bitter by Lucy Beam
Bitter
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Lucy Beam
Cross Stitch pattern from Lucy Beam Love in Stitches featuring the phrase "Pray for me. I'm bitter"! The model was stitched on 36ct....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:88w x 96
Fabric:36ct. Linen Smoke Blue
Floss:Gentle Art
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Envious by Lucy Beam
Envious
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Lucy Beam
Cross Stitch pattern from Lucy Beam Love in Stitches featuring the phrase "Pray for me. I'm envious"! The model was stitched on 36ct....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:95w x 92
Fabric:36ct. Linen Platinum/China White
Floss:Gentle Art
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Stubborn by Lucy Beam
Stubborn
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Lucy Beam
Cross Stitch pattern from Lucy Beam Love in Stitches featuring the phrase "Pray for me. I'm stubborn"! The model was stitched on 36ct....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:84w x 78
Fabric:36ct. Linen Platinum/China White
Floss:Gentle Art
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Kitty Approved 2 by Artists Alley
Kitty Approved 2
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artists Alley
a counted cross-stitch design featuring a cat-themed subject, available as a physical pattern leaflet. It is characterized as a detailed...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:225w x 134
Fabric:14ct. Aida Ice Blue
Floss:DMC
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, When The Shoe Fit by Keslyn's
When The Shoe Fit
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Keslyn's
Cross stitch pattern from Keslyn's featuring a witch's shoes and hat with the phrase "When the shoe fits, buy the hat"! Pattern is...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:115w x 110
Fabric:28ct. Linen Peaceful Purple
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$12.29
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Early Bird by Iris Originals
Early Bird
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yeah, I'm not crazy about worms - BUT I'll definitely take the coffee.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:83w x 95
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, WiFi Passwork (Family Friendly Version) by The Stitcherhood
WiFi Passwork (Family Friendly Version)
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
Here is a fun and funny cross stitch pattern that claims the household WiFi pattern is ” Better2ReadABook! ” in hopes that people will read...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:127w x 63
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:DMC #3799 (dark gray)
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, My Superpower by Iris Originals
My Superpower
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
So, that's my superpower - what's yours? I do love my coffee :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:87w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Too Much Coffee by Iris Originals
Too Much Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yes, I'm a coffee addict. Yes, I drink coffee all day. I'll bet you know someone that does the same thing. Perfect little chart for them.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:135w x 140
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:11 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee is the Answer by Iris Originals
Coffee is the Answer
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
This chart is perfect for a coffee lover (me). Great as something for yourself, or for that coffee loving friend.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:99w x 90
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:8 colors Anchor or DMC
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Find Me Under The Palms by Romy's Creations
Find Me Under The Palms
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Romy's Creations
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Don't Call Me Cute by Peacock & Fig
Don't Call Me Cute
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
If you’re feeling feisty, the “Don’t Call Me Cute” cross stitch pattern might be right up your alley. With vibrant purples, corals, and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:92w x 98
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Thrills & Spills by Peacock & Fig
Thrills & Spills
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Nothing says “retro cross stitch” like a little blast from Scandinavian design past… Remember in the 70’s when printed paper towels were...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:117w x 161
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
$11.98
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