Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Patience and Coffee by Iris Originals
Patience and Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yes, I'm a serious coffee drinker - and this chart is just perfect for someone like me. Cute gift for a friend.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:83w x 92
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  11/2/2021
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sewing Room by Iris Originals
Sewing Room
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
This actually applies to my sewing room, craft area, office - wherever - and let's don't forget the room where our cross stitch stash is!!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:105w x 158
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:9 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  10/25/2021
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... CRAFT and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... CRAFT and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any CRAFTING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... CRAFT and Take Naps! Included...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Fabric:14ct. aida white
Floss:DMC
Released:  10/21/2021
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... CROCHET and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... CROCHET and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any CROCHETING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... CROCHET and Take Naps!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 900
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Released:  10/21/2021
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... GO HUNTING and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... GO HUNTING and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any HUNTING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... GO HUNTING and Take Naps!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Released:  10/21/2021
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... GARDEN and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... GARDEN and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any GARDENING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... GARDEN and Take Naps!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Released:  10/21/2021
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... GAMBLE and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... GAMBLE and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any GAMBLING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... GAMBLE and Take Naps!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Released:  10/21/2021
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Don't Exercise by Iris Originals
I Don't Exercise
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yeah, you know with me, coffee comes first. It's tricky to do anything with coffee in my cup.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:92w x 82
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:9 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  10/14/2021
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, What The Elf by Cross Stitch Wonders
What The Elf
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Fun Christmas Saying counted cross stitch design! Cross Stitch design by Marcia Manning. Design is 114 stitches wide by 120 stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:114w x 120
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Released:  10/8/2021
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Your Issues by Sue Hillis Designs
Your Issues
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
This bold, humorous pattern features the phrase “Please cancel my subscription to your issues” framed with classic stamp-style details and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:110w x 102
Fabric:14ct. Aida Ivory
Floss:DMC Floss
Released:  9/30/2021
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Your Attitude... by Sue Hillis Designs
Your Attitude...
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
This spirited pattern set features three playful sayings—“She’s got that girl boss hustle,” “Get stuff done,” and “Alexa, skip to...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:63w x 95
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC Floss
Released:  9/30/2021
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Poke it with a Stick by Iris Originals
Poke it with a Stick
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
I'm not much on seizing the day. I just kinda poke it with a stick! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 80 x 91. Model stitched on...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:80w x 91
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 DMC colors
Released:  9/27/2021
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Roses are Red Violets are Blue ... Poo by Cross Stitch Wonders
Roses are Red Violets are Blue ... Poo
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
It's a sweet, humorous thank-you note from your furry friend—perfectly capturing that adorable blend of love and, well… responsibility....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:118w x 139
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
Released:  9/13/2021
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Kid Proof Lids by Iris Originals
Kid Proof Lids
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Don't know about you - but there are LOTS of lids out there that I can't open these days. They sure don't make things for older people to...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:97w x 96
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  9/13/2021
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Good Grief by Iris Originals
Good Grief
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well this describes me perfectly. It can almost be looking at me and I still can't find it.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 91
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  9/3/2021
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Crabby Day by Sue Hillis Designs
Crabby Day
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
Ever wake up crabby because you’ve got nothing to stitch? This cheeky little design captures that exact feeling—with a bright coral crab...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:59w x 64
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
Released:  8/18/2021
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... READ BOOKS and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... READ BOOKS and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any READING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Tea (or Coffee, Beer, Wine, Cocktails) READ BOOKS and Take Naps! Included...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
Released:  8/15/2021
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... GO CAMPING and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... GO CAMPING and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any CAMPING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails (or Coffee, Beer, Wine, Tea) GO CAMPING and Take Naps! Included...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Released:  8/15/2021
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... SAVE ANIMALS and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... SAVE ANIMALS and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any ANIMAL / RESCUE / SHELTER enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Wine (or Coffee, Beer, Tea, Cocktails) SAVE ANIMALS and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Released:  8/15/2021
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... CROSS STITCH and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... CROSS STITCH and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A wonderful saying for any CROSS STITCH enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Coffee (or Beer, Tea, Wine, Cocktails) CROSS STITCH and Take Naps!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
Released:  8/14/2021
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... GO FISHING and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... GO FISHING and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any FISHING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Beer (or Coffee, Tea, Wine, Cocktails) GO FISHING and Take Naps! Included...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Released:  8/14/2021
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Life Happens by Iris Originals
Life Happens
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, that's the way I feel a lot of mornings (and afternoons and evenings). Coffee always helps.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:75w x 61
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  8/13/2021
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Plan Ahead & Follow Through by The Stitcherhood
Plan Ahead & Follow Through
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
A wonderfully silly pair of cross stitch designs poking fun at one’s self for not planning ahead or following through to the end of a...
Pattern Details:
Size:see description
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC #3799
Released:  8/12/2021
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sit on the Floor by Iris Originals
Sit on the Floor
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
I must admit, I have to remind myself of that pretty often - because, without a plan, I'm sorta stuck. Counted cross stitch pattern....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:98w x 115
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
Released:  8/9/2021
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, It Came With The House by Hands on Design
It Came With The House
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Hands on Design
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:65w x 91
Fabric:32ct. belfast antique white
Released:  8/5/2021
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, May Your Coffee Kick In by Romy's Creations
May Your Coffee Kick In
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Romy's Creations
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Released:  7/19/2021
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Multi Tasker by Iris Originals
Multi Tasker
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Oh yeah - this is one of my better talents - "Listen, ignore and forget all at the same time." Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:119w x 147
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
Released:  7/13/2021
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Resting Beach Face by Hands on Design
Resting Beach Face
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Hands on Design
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Released:  7/13/2021
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Cabin Rules by Pickle Barrel Designs
Cabin Rules
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Pickle Barrel Designs
Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count 86w x 116h. A cute saying for a cozy cabin that says: Cabin Rules: Match a sunrise, Go...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:86w x 116
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC Floss and Weeks Dye Works
Released:  6/28/2021
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Bookstore by Rogue Stitchery
Bookstore
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 108 x 32. Chart will be in color and project includes full stitches, quarter stitches, half...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:108w x 32
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
Released:  6/17/2021
$5.99
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Cross Stitch Patterns, When I Was a Kid by Iris Originals
When I Was a Kid
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
This probably fits most of us... but when we get there, well, maybe being a kid isn't such a bad thing after all.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:95w x 91
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  6/15/2021
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Today's Specials by Iris Originals
Today's Specials
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yup, that's the special many days - lack of sleep, up to early and definitely low on patience. :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:107w x 118
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  6/15/2021
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Bail Money by Iris Originals
Bail Money
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:117w x 89
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  6/2/2021
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Butter Believe It by Silver Creek Samplers
Butter Believe It
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Silver Creek Samplers
"I have a lot to say, maybe you should get popcorn" Model stitched on 18 Ct. Fog Aida by Picture This Plus with Gentle Art Sampler...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:86w x 100
Fabric:18ct. Aida White
Released:  5/17/2021
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Spilling Coffee by Iris Originals
Spilling Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
You know how a little kid is if their balloon gets away - well, that about says it all. Be careful - don't spill the coffee.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:98w x 83
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:10 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  5/10/2021
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Big Books by Rogue Stitchery
Big Books
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:112w x 32
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Released:  5/8/2021
$5.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, No Insomnia by Rogue Stitchery
No Insomnia
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:32w x 105
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Released:  5/5/2021
$4.99
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Need to Read by Rogue Stitchery
Need to Read
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
This pattern is a double-sided, single page. The first side is the cover page. It contains a full color photo of the stitched design. ...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:113w x 32
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Released:  4/28/2021
$4.99
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Rise & Shine by Iris Originals
Rise & Shine
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Don't know about you - but I'm thinking I'm not the only one that isn't bright eyed when she gets out of bed. Great chart for a friend who...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:77w x 94
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  4/28/2021
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I'm Explaining by Iris Originals
I'm Explaining
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Just another cute saying - and yes, I am right :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:99w x 78
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  4/17/2021
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Magic Coffee by Iris Originals
Magic Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yes, I'm a coffee addict. I do love my coffee and I love to smell coffee. It is about as close to magic as you can get.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 94
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  4/1/2021
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A Positive Sign by The Stitcherhood
A Positive Sign
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
A Positive Sign, a humorous, easy and fun cross stitch design! Model stitched on 14 count fiddler oatmeal Aida cross stitch fabric and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:86w x 116
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC #3799
Released:  3/27/2021
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Excuse Me by Iris Originals
Excuse Me
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
I have squirrels - do you have squirrels? They are adorably annoying little creatures and love bird seed. Counted cross stitch pattern....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:105w x 78
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
Released:  3/23/2021
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Stabby by The Stitcherhood
Stabby
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
Stabby, a humorous and fun cross stitch design for cross stitch lovers. Model stitched on 14 count white Aida cross stitch fabric and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:120w x 110
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC dark gray (#3799) and red (#321)
Released:  3/18/2021
$4.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Murdery by The Stitcherhood
Murdery
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
Murdery, a humorous and fun cross stitch design for cross stitch lovers. Model stitched on 14 count white Aida cross stitch fabric and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:122w x 54
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC dark gray (#3799) and red (#321)
Released:  3/18/2021
$4.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, You are my dino-mite by Kiokiz
You are my dino-mite
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:44w x 45
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC 7 colors
Released:  3/16/2021
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Bless your Little Heart by Iris Originals
Bless your Little Heart
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Another cute coffee saying, and yes, I am a coffee addict!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:105w x 113
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:15 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  3/5/2021
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Note to Self by Iris Originals
Note to Self
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yup, everyday. Just because I think it doesn't mean I should say it!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:107w x 90
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  2/18/2021
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Turkey Crossing by Cross-Point Designs
Turkey Crossing
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross-Point Designs
Frame it or make it into a little pillow, this design will is sure to bring chuckles!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:60w x 60
Fabric:14ct. Aida Ivory
Floss:DMC
Released:  2/12/2021
$4.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Younger by Imaginating
Younger
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Don't we all wish we get older while looking younger?! This Mary Engelbreit design is the perfect project to gift to a friend or family...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 43
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:19 DMC floss colors
Released:  2/9/2021
$7.00
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