Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sarcasm by Rogue Stitchery
Sarcasm
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
This pattern is a front-and-back, single-page (double-sided) pattern. The cover page is in full color and contains a photo of the stitched...
Pattern Details:
Size:8-1/8w X 4-1/8h in
Fabric:0
Released:  11/25/2018
$3.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee - When Size Matters by Rogue Stitchery
Coffee - When Size Matters
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
This pattern consists of two pages – a full color cover sheet with a photo of the finished design, stitch count with fabric sizes for...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:114w x 102
Fabric:14ct. aida
Released:  11/25/2018
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, No Shelf Control by Rogue Stitchery
No Shelf Control
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
This pattern consists of four pages – a full color cover sheet with a photo of the finished design; an easy-to-read pattern that spreads...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:199w x 126
Fabric:14ct. aida white
Released:  11/25/2018
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Dog in Charge by Imaginating
Dog in Charge
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Man's best friend is always in charge and this adorable design is the perfect way to display their badge of honor! Counted cross stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:86w x 93
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:7 DMC colors
Released:  11/9/2018
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Ring the Bell by Artists Alley
Ring the Bell
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artists Alley
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:131w x 75
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
Released:  10/30/2018
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Invisible Crown by Kiokiz
Invisible Crown
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Kiokiz
Released:  10/22/2018
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Hap-pea by Kiokiz
Hap-pea
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Size:57 x 38 stitches
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Released:  10/22/2018
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Movie Quotes by Kiokiz
Movie Quotes
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:58w x 35
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
Released:  10/19/2018
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Pugs not drugs by Kiokiz
Pugs not drugs
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Size:57 x 88 stitches
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Released:  10/19/2018
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, But First, Coffee by Iris Originals
But First, Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
No explanation necessary - BUT FIRST, COFFEE! :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:85w x 45
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:2 colors Anchor or DMC floss
Released:  10/10/2018
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Garden Hoes by Peacock & Fig
Garden Hoes
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Are you one of those people who love sarcasm and quick-witted comebacks? If so, the Garden Hoes hand embroidery pattern might be an ideal...
Pattern Details:
Size:5 1/2" diameter
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Released:  10/10/2018
$10.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Go Pollinate Yourself by Peacock & Fig
Go Pollinate Yourself
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
The Go Pollinate Yourself cross stitch pattern pairs a cheeky phrase with a whimsical floral wreath, and is perfect if you have small...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC, Kreinik
Designer:Peacock & Fig
Released:  10/10/2018
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sit on a Thorn by Peacock & Fig
Sit on a Thorn
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
The snarky quote in Sit on a Thorn contrasts with the sparkle in the Kreinik thread and elegance of the pattern, and it’s guaranteed to...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC, Kreinik
Designer:Peacock & Fig
Released:  10/10/2018
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Fresh Out of Fuchsias by Peacock & Fig
Fresh Out of Fuchsias
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Are you one of those people who likes to push boundaries just a little, seeing what you can get away with? If so, the Fresh Out of Fuchsias...
Pattern Details:
Size:5" diameter
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Released:  10/10/2018
$10.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Zero Fronds Given by Peacock & Fig
Zero Fronds Given
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Zero Fronds Given is a fun and sassy cross stitch pattern that helps you “check in” to remind yourself that this too shall pass. This...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
Released:  10/10/2018
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Eat Cake by Sue Hillis Designs
Eat Cake
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap - Stay safe Eat cake.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:62w x 91
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Released:  9/25/2018
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, It's Cupcake O'Clock by Sue Hillis Designs
It's Cupcake O'Clock
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
Cupcake happy hour.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:118w x 104
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Released:  9/25/2018
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, The Witch is In by Artists Alley
The Witch is In
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artists Alley
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:116w x 80
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
Released:  9/16/2018
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, "A home is just a house without a cat!" by StitchyFish Designs
"A home is just a house without a cat!"
a Cross Stitch Pattern by StitchyFish Designs
Here's on for all my cat loving friends who know a home is just a house without a cat!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:50w x 100
Fabric:14ct. aida white
Floss:DMC or your choice
Released:  9/11/2018
$4.99
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I'm Not Old, I'm 25+ s&h by MarNic Designs
I'm Not Old, I'm 25+ s&h
a Cross Stitch Pattern by MarNic Designs
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:86w x 57
Fabric:28ct. Jobelan Antique White
Released:  9/10/2018
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Unicorn by Kiokiz
Unicorn
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Kiokiz
Released:  9/3/2018
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Cute but Psycho by Kiokiz
Cute but Psycho
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Size:55 x 48 stitches
Fabric:0
Released:  9/1/2018
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Rolling Eyes by Iris Originals
Rolling Eyes
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
"I'm sorry, did I roll my eyes out loud?" I'm sure you never do that - unfortunately I do it frequently so this is an appropriate saying...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:80w x 112
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC floss
Released:  8/14/2018
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, When I am Old....Grandchildren by MarNic Designs
When I am Old....Grandchildren
a Cross Stitch Pattern by MarNic Designs
"If I'd know grandchildren were this much fun, I'd had them to begin with!" Model stitched 28 Ct. Antique White Jobelan with DMC floss and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:119w x 88
Fabric:28ct. Jobelan Antique White
Floss:DMC Floss and Kreinik
Released:  8/6/2018
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Mermaid Struggles by Peacock & Fig
Mermaid Struggles
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
The fourth of the Mermaid Tales cross stitch pattern set, this sassy cross stitch pattern inspires you to take a beach holiday. Beautiful...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC, Kreinik
Designer:Peacock & Fig
Released:  8/3/2018
$8.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Mirror Mirror by Peacock & Fig
Mirror Mirror
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
The Mirror Mirror cross stitch pattern, the third of the Mermaid Tales cross stitch pattern set, is a cheeky look at a mermaid’s beauty...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC, Kreinik
Designer:Peacock & Fig
Released:  8/3/2018
$8.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A Black Belt is a White Belt who never QUIT by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Black Belt is a White Belt who never QUIT
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great TAEKWONDO Phrase/Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this from Semi Exclusive Licensed artwork by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:87w x 100
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:Sulky 12 Wt. Cotton Petites™
Released:  8/2/2018
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Rainbow Cups by Rogue Stitchery
Rainbow Cups
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
This pattern consists of four pages – a full color cover sheet with a photo of the finished design; an easy-to-read pattern that spreads...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:174w x 85
Fabric:14ct. aida white
Released:  7/9/2018
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, OCD - Obsessive Coffee Disorder by Rogue Stitchery
OCD - Obsessive Coffee Disorder
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
Perfect for the Coffee Obsessive! This pattern uses various mauves, greens and gray-ish cocoas. The horizontal border along the top and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:145w x 91
Fabric:14ct. aida white
Released:  6/10/2018
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Adulting Is Hard by Rogue Stitchery
Adulting Is Hard
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
Coffee! A favorite drink of so many of us. This pattern calls out to the coffee lover. Designed with a whimsical saying, it uses...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 70
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Released:  5/28/2018
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Without Coffee by Iris Originals
Without Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yes, I'm a self confessed coffee addict, and anyone who knows me knows that - so friends are always teasing me. That's okay - just don't...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 78
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC
Released:  5/28/2018
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Loads Of Fun (Laundry Company2) by Hands on Design
Loads Of Fun (Laundry Company2)
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Hands on Design
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Released:  5/21/2018
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Dorothy's Discovery by Silver Creek Samplers
Dorothy's Discovery
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Silver Creek Samplers
"The power is there whenever you choose, it's found in the heart not in your shoes." Order stitched over 2 threads on 32 Ct. Angel Hair...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:149w x 71
Fabric:32ct. Linen
Floss:DMC, WDW & GA
Released:  4/30/2018
$11.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Best FRiend by Iris Originals
Best FRiend
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Cute saying about your best friend - does she know too much - probably :-)
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 93
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:6 DMC or Anchor colors
Released:  4/26/2018
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Let's Go To Therapy by Imaginating
Let's Go To Therapy
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
A fun and colorful project that explains what exactly is the best therapy around!Let's Go To Therapy is designed to be stitched on 14ct...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:131w x 116
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 DMC floss colors
Released:  2/21/2018
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Freshly Brewed Coffee by Iris Originals
Freshly Brewed Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Don't you just love the smell of freshly brewed coffee - or maybe you're not a coffeeholic like me. Anyway, this makes a great little...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:121w x 79
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:6 colors DMC or Anchor
Released:  2/15/2018
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee Drinker ... Camping Problem by Cross Stitch Wonders
Coffee Drinker ... Camping Problem
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great COFFEE/CAMPING Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this from Exclusive artwork by Sanquentti Design....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:132w x 108
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:Sulky 12 Wt. Cotton Petites™
Released:  2/3/2018
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Old People by Iris Originals
Old People
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Don't Make Old People Mad - we don't like being old in the first place so it doesn't take much to piss us off. Counted cross stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:70w x 87
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 DMC colors
Released:  1/26/2018
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Best Friends & Coffee by Iris Originals
Best Friends & Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Best Friends don't care if your house is clean, they care if you have coffee. Great chart for coffee lovers.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:94w x 75
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors DMC or Anchor
Released:  1/26/2018
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Just Say No by Peacock & Fig
Just Say No
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Have you ever had days where you want to just say no to stupidity?! This elegant and funny cross stitch pattern is perfect for making you...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
Released:  1/15/2018
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Protecting Mama by Iris Originals
Protecting Mama
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
My little dog barks at EVERYTHING! Maybe you know someone with one like that - or do you have one too.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:92w x 107
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 colors DMC or Anchor
Released:  12/11/2017
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, My Drinking Friends ... Camping Problem by Cross Stitch Wonders
My Drinking Friends ... Camping Problem
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great FRIENDS/CAMPING Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this from Exclusive artwork by Sanquentti Design....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:130w x 98
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
Released:  11/30/2017
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Official Cookie Tester by Cross Stitch Wonders
Official Cookie Tester
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great HOLIDAY Phrase/Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this from Licensed artwork by Sanquentti Design....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:106w x 100
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
Released:  11/15/2017
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Ohh Deer Christmas is Here by Cross Stitch Wonders
Ohh Deer Christmas is Here
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great HOLIDAY Phrase/Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this from Licensed artwork by Sanquentti Design....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:99w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
Released:  11/15/2017
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Her Ladyship by Peacock & Fig
Her Ladyship
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Celebrate the joy of a beautiful newborn with this exquisite baby girl cross stitch pattern! Her Ladyship includes an alphabet chart and...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC, Kreinik
Designer:Peacock & Fig
Released:  10/23/2017
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, His Lordship by Peacock & Fig
His Lordship
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Commemorate the arrival of the handsome newborn with this regal baby boy cross stitch pattern! His Lordship comes with an alphabet and full...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC, Kreinik
Designer:Peacock & Fig
Released:  10/23/2017
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Wedding Nights by Peacock & Fig
Wedding Nights
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
If you've ever wondered what to take to a bridal shower, then maybe this sassy marriage cross stitch pattern will be just what you're...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
Released:  10/23/2017
$10.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Bow Before Me by Peacock & Fig
Bow Before Me
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
You'll never have to wonder what to give for a gift ever again with this elegantly sassy birthday cross stitch pattern. Not only does Bow...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Released:  10/23/2017
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, If Mama Ain't Happy by Iris Originals
If Mama Ain't Happy
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, it's true - if Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy - but... watch out for Grandma!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:104w x 62
Fabric:14ct. aida white
Floss:2 DMC or Anchor floss
Released:  9/30/2017
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Common Sense by Iris Originals
Common Sense
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Just a little cute saying - unfortunately that flower truly doesn't grow in everyone's garden.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:60w x 62
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC or Anchor floss
Released:  9/14/2017
$6.00
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