Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... CROCHET and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... CROCHET and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any CROCHETING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... CROCHET and Take Naps!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 900
Floss:DMC
Designer:Marcia Manning
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... GO FISHING and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... GO FISHING and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any FISHING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Beer (or Coffee, Tea, Wine, Cocktails) GO FISHING and Take Naps! Included...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Floss:DMC
Designer:Marcia Manning
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... GARDEN and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... GARDEN and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any GARDENING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... GARDEN and Take Naps!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Floss:DMC
Designer:Marcia Manning
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... GO CAMPING and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... GO CAMPING and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any CAMPING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails (or Coffee, Beer, Wine, Tea) GO CAMPING and Take Naps! Included...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Floss:DMC
Designer:Marcia Manning
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A MUGnificent Stitch - ANOTHER WINE DRINKER WITH A CAMPING PROBLEM by Cross Stitch Wonders
A MUGnificent Stitch - ANOTHER WINE DRINKER WITH A CAMPING PROBLEM
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great WINE / FRIEND / CAMPING SAYING design with a plaid background in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch designs!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:154w x 156
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... GAMBLE and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... GAMBLE and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any GAMBLING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Cocktails / Coffee / Beer / Wine / Tea .... GAMBLE and Take Naps!...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Floss:DMC
Designer:Marcia Manning
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... SAVE ANIMALS and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... SAVE ANIMALS and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any ANIMAL / RESCUE / SHELTER enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Wine (or Coffee, Beer, Tea, Cocktails) SAVE ANIMALS and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Floss:DMC
Designer:Marcia Manning
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A MUGnificent Stitch - MY DRINKING FRIENDS HAVE A CAMPING PROBLEM 2 by Cross Stitch Wonders
A MUGnificent Stitch - MY DRINKING FRIENDS HAVE A CAMPING PROBLEM 2
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great DRINKING / FRIEND / CAMPING SAYING design with a plaid background in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:154w x 156
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A MUGnificent Stitch - MY DRINKING FRIENDS HAVE A CAMPING PROBLEM by Cross Stitch Wonders
A MUGnificent Stitch - MY DRINKING FRIENDS HAVE A CAMPING PROBLEM
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great DRINKING / FRIEND / CAMPING SAYING design with a plaid background in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:154w x 156
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A MUGnificent Stitch - Peas Be Kind to Others by Cross Stitch Wonders
A MUGnificent Stitch - Peas Be Kind to Others
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Beautiful FARMERS MARKET THEME SAYING design in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch designs! PEAS BE KIND TO OTHERS...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:154w x 156
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - Eye Rolling is My Cardio by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - Eye Rolling is My Cardio
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Perfect for anyone fluent in sarcasm, this colorful design features the hilarious phrase, "Eye Rolling Is My Cardio." A fun stitch that's...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - It's a Beautiful Day to Leave Me Alone by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - It's a Beautiful Day to Leave Me Alone
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A cheerful reminder to embrace each day with a positive outlook, this uplifting design encourages you to focus on the sunshine and leave...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - It's Okay if You Don't Like Me. Not Everyone Has Good Taste. by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - It's Okay if You Don't Like Me. Not Everyone Has Good Taste.
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A little sassy and full of confidence, this humorous design is perfect for anyone who believes that not everyone has good taste. A fun...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Butt First Coffee by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Butt First Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Start your day with a smile and a cup of coffee! This playful design featuring a mischievous cat is the perfect stitch for coffee lovers...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Come to the Dark Side We Have Cookies by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Come to the Dark Side We Have Cookies
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
oin the fun side with this cheeky design featuring the irresistible invitation, "Come to the Dark Side... We Have Cookies." A playful...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - I Don't Like Morning People. Or People. Or Mornings. by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - I Don't Like Morning People. Or People. Or Mornings.
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Not a morning person? This hilarious design says it all! Perfect for anyone who needs coffee before conversation and isn't afraid to admit...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - I Eat Cake Because It's Somebody's Birthday Somewhere by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - I Eat Cake Because It's Somebody's Birthday Somewhere
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Life's too short to skip dessert! This colorful and lighthearted design is perfect for anyone who believes it's always somebody's birthday...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Kiss My Sass by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Kiss My Sass
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A little bold, a little sassy, and guaranteed to get a laugh! This playful design is perfect for anyone with a feisty sense of humor and a...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Sarcasm Level Expert by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Sarcasm Level Expert
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
For those who have mastered the art of witty comebacks, this hilarious design features a "Sarcasm Level: Expert" meter that's perfect for...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Zero Meows Given by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Zero Meows Given
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Perfect for cat lovers with a sassy streak, this playful design features the cheeky phrase "Zero Meows Given." A fun stitch that's sure to...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A MUGnificent Stitch - DON'T KALE MY VIBE by Cross Stitch Wonders
A MUGnificent Stitch - DON'T KALE MY VIBE
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Beautiful FARMERS MARKET THEME SAYING design in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch designs! DON'T KALE MY VIBE in...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:154w x 156
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A MUGnificent Stitch - IT TAKES TWO TO MANGO by Cross Stitch Wonders
A MUGnificent Stitch - IT TAKES TWO TO MANGO
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Beautiful FARMERS MARKET THEME SAYING design in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch designs! IT TAKES TWO TO MANGO in...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:154w x 156
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A MUGnificent Stitch - PRACTICE WHAT YOU PEACH by Cross Stitch Wonders
A MUGnificent Stitch - PRACTICE WHAT YOU PEACH
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Beautiful FARMERS MARKET THEME SAYING design in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch designs! PRACTICE WHAT YOU PEACH...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:154w x 156
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A MUGnificent Stitch - YOU'VE GUAC TO BE KIDDING ME by Cross Stitch Wonders
A MUGnificent Stitch - YOU'VE GUAC TO BE KIDDING ME
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Beautiful FARMERS MARKET THEME SAYING design in our A MUGnificent Stitch Series of counted cross stitch designs! YOU'VE GUAC TO BE...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:154w x 156
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Queen of Quite a Lot by The Scarlett House
Queen of Quite a Lot
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Scarlett House
Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 111 x 66. Model stitched on 40ct Legacy linen by Picture This Plus using DMC floss. We do not...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:111w x 66
Fabric:40ct. Linen
Floss:6 DMC colors
On Sale:$5.60
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I'd Be Crabby! by Linda Jeanne Jenkins
I'd Be Crabby!
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Linda Jeanne Jenkins
So just hand over the cross stitching and nobody will get pinched! This design is worked with whole stitches and backstitching.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:59w x 61
Fabric:14ct. Fiddler's Cloth Oatmeal Lite
Floss:DMC
$5.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Roses are Red Violets are Blue ... Poo by Cross Stitch Wonders
Roses are Red Violets are Blue ... Poo
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
It's a sweet, humorous thank-you note from your furry friend—perfectly capturing that adorable blend of love and, well… responsibility....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:118w x 139
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Love You To The Moon by Imaginating
Love You To The Moon
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Shoot for the stars with this sweet and whimsical design! Featuring a colorful rocket ship, crescent moon, and twinkling stars, it’s...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:84w x 127
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A Cat Saying - I Run on Coffee, Sarcasm And Cats by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Cat Saying - I Run on Coffee, Sarcasm And Cats
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A GREAT CAT SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 198 stitches wide by 192 stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:192w x 198
Floss:DMC
Designer:Marcia Manning
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A Dog Saying - I Run on Coffee, Sarcasm and Dogs by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Dog Saying - I Run on Coffee, Sarcasm and Dogs
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A GREAT DOG SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 198 stitches wide by 198 stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:198w x 198
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, My Dog Thinks I'm Cool by Cross Stitch Wonders
My Dog Thinks I'm Cool
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
My Dog Thinks I'm Cool - She's(He's) Very Wise. Licensed artwork by Anastasia Feya. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 160 x 146....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:160w x 146
Fabric:16ct. Aida White
Floss:2 DMC colors
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, My Cat Thinks I'm Cool by Cross Stitch Wonders
My Cat Thinks I'm Cool
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
My Cat Thinks I'm Cool She's Very Wise. (omit the S in she if you have a male cat) :-) A GREAT CAT SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:160w x 155
Fabric:16ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Life Is What Happens Between Coffee And Beer by Cross Stitch Wonders
Life Is What Happens Between Coffee And Beer
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great LIFE IS WHAT HAPPENS BETWEEN COFFEE AND BEER saying/phrase design. Designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 80 stitches wide by 128...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:80w x 128
Fabric:16ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, If you keep a glass of WINE in each hand, you can't touch your face. by Cross Stitch Wonders
If you keep a glass of WINE in each hand, you can't touch your face.
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great WINE saying with wearing a mask for Covid in mind! IF YOU KEEP A GLASS OF WINE IN EACH HAND, YOU CAN'T TOUCH YOUR FACE counted...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:180w x 116
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, If you keep a BEER in each hand, you can't touch your face. by Cross Stitch Wonders
If you keep a BEER in each hand, you can't touch your face.
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great BEER saying with wearing a mask for Covid in mind! IF YOU KEEP A BEER IN EACH HAND, YOU CAN'T TOUCH YOUR FACE counted cross stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:180w x 96
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$5.09
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Ew. People. by The Stitcherhood
Ew. People.
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
A fun, easy and humorous pattern that shows two cats with one thinking “Ew. People”. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 118 x 58....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:118w x 58
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:1 DMC color
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Dear Santa by The Stitcherhood
Dear Santa
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
A fun and funny cross stitch pattern for Christmas. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 120 x 50. Model stitched on 14ct White...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:120w x 50
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:1 DMC color
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Woman Who Loves Her Dogs and Coffee by MarNic Designs
Woman Who Loves Her Dogs and Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by MarNic Designs
A whimsical offering featuring a steaming cup of coffee with a little dog alongside holding a bone, and the verse "A Woman who loves her...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:87w x 60
Fabric:28ct. Linen White
Floss:DMC, Kreinik, Rainbow Gallery PTB
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Things I Like by The Stitcherhood
Things I Like
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
Things I like is a fun and snarky cross stitch pattern for lovers of books, cats, cross stitching, and maybe a few people. Dog version...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:120w x 62
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC #3799 (dark gray), or colors of your choice
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Make Sense by The Stitcherhood
Make Sense
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
I am under no obligation to make sense to you. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 112 x 63. Model stitched on 14ct White Aida...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:112w x 63
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 DMC colors
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Ghostly by The Stitcherhood
Ghostly
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
A whimsical and fun pattern for Halloween - white floss on white fabric. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 105 x 71. Model...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:105w x 71
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:1 DMC color
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, List to do by Kiokiz
List to do
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:127w x 85
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Plan Ahead & Follow Through by The Stitcherhood
Plan Ahead & Follow Through
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
A wonderfully silly pair of cross stitch designs poking fun at one’s self for not planning ahead or following through to the end of a...
Pattern Details:
Size:see description
Floss:DMC #3799
Designer:The Stitcherhood
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I'm Not Old, I'm 25+ s&h by MarNic Designs
I'm Not Old, I'm 25+ s&h
a Cross Stitch Pattern by MarNic Designs
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:86w x 57
Fabric:28ct. Jobelan Antique White
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, My hobby by Kiokiz
My hobby
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:74w x 47
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Broom Parking by The Stitcherhood
Broom Parking
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
A sign to remind everyone not to park in your spot. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 94 x 79. Model stitched on 14ct White Aida...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:94w x 79
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:1 DMC color
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Necessary Insanity by Cross-Point Designs
Necessary Insanity
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross-Point Designs
Great for the office! Featuring Felix, a real live twenty pound cat who sometimes gets himself into a little bit of trouble. A floss...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:112w x 56
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Carry a Wand by The Stitcherhood
Carry a Wand
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
Carry A Wand, a whimsical and easy cross stitch pattern for Halloween! Model stitched on 14 count "fiddler" Aida cross stitch fabric...
Pattern Details:
Size:Will measure approx. 8.75 inches high by 4 inches wide if stitched on 14 count fabric.
Floss:DMC #310 (black)
Designer:The Stitcherhood
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Beach Repeat by The Stitcherhood
Beach Repeat
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
Beach, repeat... a fun, whimsical nautical cross stitch pattern for any beach bum like me... or for lovely beach house decor.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:57w x 71
Fabric:14ct. Aida Beige
Floss:DMC 931 or 840
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, British Accent by Kiokiz
British Accent
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
If I had a British accent - I would never shut up. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 83 x 80. Model stitched on 14ct Antique...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:83w x 80
Fabric:14ct. Aida Antique White
Floss:3 DMC colors
$5.00
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