Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Talk to Myself by Iris Originals
Talk to Myself
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Of course I talk to myself when I stitch - Sometimes I need expert advice! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 101 x 105. Model...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:101w x 105
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:6 DMC colors
$7.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A Good Friend by Sue Hillis Designs
A Good Friend
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
A good friend is like a bra - Close to your heart and very supportive. When stitched on 14 count fabric or "over two" on 28 count, fits...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:46w x 64
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Dorothy's Discovery by Silver Creek Samplers
Dorothy's Discovery
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Silver Creek Samplers
"The power is there whenever you choose, it's found in the heart not in your shoes." Order stitched over 2 threads on 32 Ct. Angel Hair...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:149w x 71
Fabric:32ct. Linen
Floss:DMC, WDW & GA
$11.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Happiness on the Couch by Romy's Creations
Happiness on the Couch
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Romy's Creations
A cozy, feel-good design for anyone who knows true happiness involves comfort and a little downtime. This playful pattern features an...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:110w x 50
Fabric:32ct. Linen Vintage Country Mocha
Floss:DMC Floss
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Things I Like by The Stitcherhood
Things I Like
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
Things I like is a fun and snarky cross stitch pattern for lovers of books, cats, cross stitching, and maybe a few people. Dog version...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:120w x 62
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC #3799 (dark gray), or colors of your choice
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Farmers Market - You've Guac To Be Kidding Me by Cross Stitch Wonders
Farmers Market - You've Guac To Be Kidding Me
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great Farm Market Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 100 stitches wide by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 88
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A Dog Saying - My Dog Thinks I'm Cool by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Dog Saying - My Dog Thinks I'm Cool
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
My Dog Thinks I'm Cool She's Very Wise. (omit the S in she if you have a male dog) :-) A GREAT DOG SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:160w x 146
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Piracy by Sue Hillis Designs
Piracy
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
Part of the Pirates series. Piracy - A viable career option. When stitched on 14 count fabric or "over two" on 28 count, fits into a 5 inch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:63w x 85
Fabric:14ct. Aida Ivory
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Your Opinion by Imaginating
Your Opinion
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Your Opinion" is for the unapologetically bold! Featuring a confident woman with one hand on her hip and the other dismissively raised,...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:97w x 125
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 DMC floss colors
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$7.65
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Cross Stitch Patterns, So Far So Good by Imaginating
So Far So Good
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Take your R&R to a whole new level with this adorable and colorful design. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 130 x 152. Model...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:130w x 152
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:28 DMC colors
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Unstoppable by Iris Originals
Unstoppable
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Unstoppable - if I could just get started. Unfortunately, that would be me on many days :-) Great gift for a busy friend - or stitch for...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:95w x 96
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 skeins Anchor or DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Poke it with a Stick by Iris Originals
Poke it with a Stick
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
I'm not much on seizing the day. I just kinda poke it with a stick! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 80 x 91. Model stitched on...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:80w x 91
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 DMC colors
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Good Intentions by Kathy Barrick
Good Intentions
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kathy Barrick
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:112w x 110
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Loads Of Fun (Laundry Company2) by Hands on Design
Loads Of Fun (Laundry Company2)
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Hands on Design
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, So Much to Do by Iris Originals
So Much to Do
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Ah...so much to do - so little desire to do it! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 93 x 94. Model stitched on 14ct White Aida...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:93w x 94
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 DMC colors
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Shuts A Door by Imaginating
Shuts A Door
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
This design oozes attitude and charm, combining classic black and white aesthetics with cheeky wit. Once stitched, hang it on your wall as...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 128
Fabric:14ct. Aida Black
Floss:1 DMC floss colors
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$5.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Ms. Beer Gnome by Cross Stitch Wonders
Ms. Beer Gnome
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
MS. BEER GNOME is great whether stitched by itself or along with the funny saying. Marcia Manning designed this from licensed artwork. Full...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:145w x 115
Floss:DMC
Designer:Marcia Manning
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Eyeroll by Imaginating
Eyeroll
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
We've all had those days, and this stitch captures it perfectly! Featuring a frazzled woman at her desk, clearly done with it all, this...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:102w x 129
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:6 DMC floss colors
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$7.65
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I'm Multitasking. I Can Listen, Ignore and Forget at the Same Time by Cross Stitch Wonders
I'm Multitasking. I Can Listen, Ignore and Forget at the Same Time
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
PURRFECT! ADORABLE CAT Saying by Marcia Manning. Original Art by Funky Frog Creative Designs. Design is 120 stitches wide by 150 stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:120w x 150
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, It Came With The House by Hands on Design
It Came With The House
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Hands on Design
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:65w x 91
Fabric:32ct. belfast antique white
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Need to Read by Rogue Stitchery
Need to Read
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
This pattern is a double-sided, single page. The first side is the cover page. It contains a full color photo of the stitched design. ...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:113w x 32
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
$4.99
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Inside Every Old Person by Iris Originals
Inside Every Old Person
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Inside every old person is a young person wondering what happened! And how true is that?! But you know - at least we're old - better than...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:92w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 DMC or Anchor colors
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Bookstore by Rogue Stitchery
Bookstore
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 108 x 32. Chart will be in color and project includes full stitches, quarter stitches, half...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:108w x 32
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$5.99
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Black Hat Society by Sue Hillis Designs
Black Hat Society
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
Proud member of the Black Hat Society. Candy corn button included.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:69w x 49
Fabric:14ct. Aida Lilac
On Sale:$6.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, To Drink Coffee by Sweet Wing Studio
To Drink Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sweet Wing Studio
For the true coffee lovers out there—this fun and cheeky design says it all! Bold lettering and cozy colors make this a perfect project to...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:59w x 90
Fabric:28ct. Lugana Mushroom
Floss:WDW, DMC and CCW
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Just Want To Drink .... READ BOOKS and Take Naps by Cross Stitch Wonders
I Just Want To Drink .... READ BOOKS and Take Naps
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great saying for any READING enthusiast! I Just Want To Drink Tea (or Coffee, Beer, Wine, Cocktails) READ BOOKS and Take Naps! Included...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 90
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, My Cat.... Wakes Me EARLY by Iris Originals
My Cat.... Wakes Me EARLY
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
So you have a cat who wakes you --- or you have a friend that does. This is a compliment chart to my "My Dog". So now both are available...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:110w x 82
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 DMC or Anchor
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Bears will Kill You by Iris Originals
Bears will Kill You
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
I've heard many times, "that which doesn't kill you will make you stronger"...but I sure don't want to meet a bear - don't think I could...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:131w x 103
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee and Jesus by Iris Originals
Coffee and Jesus
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, this is definitely a true statement for me - and hopefully for you too.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:86w x 96
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Farmers Market - Peas Be Kind to Others by Cross Stitch Wonders
Farmers Market - Peas Be Kind to Others
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great Farm Market Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 98 stitches wide by...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:98w x 90
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Note to Self by Iris Originals
Note to Self
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yup, everyday. Just because I think it doesn't mean I should say it!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:107w x 90
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Don't Panic by The Stitcherhood
Don't Panic
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
Don't panic. Organize! A design for anti-bullying, pro community or individual empowerment.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:112w x 109
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:2 DMC colors
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sewing Room by Iris Originals
Sewing Room
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
This actually applies to my sewing room, craft area, office - wherever - and let's don't forget the room where our cross stitch stash is!!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:105w x 158
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:9 colors Anchor or DMC
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I'd Exercise ... Wine by Cross Stitch Wonders
I'd Exercise ... Wine
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great EXERCISE/WINE Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this from Exclusive artwork by Sanquentti Design. ...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:127w x 98
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I'm Not Weird by MarNic Designs
I'm Not Weird
a Cross Stitch Pattern by MarNic Designs
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:95w x 52
$3.99
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee and Dinosaurs by Iris Originals
Coffee and Dinosaurs
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yup, those poor dinosaurs. Thank God we have coffee - my hubby used to say I just needed a coffee IV. Great gift for that coffee lover in...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:142w x 87
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Train of Thought by Iris Originals
Train of Thought
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yeah, and this is happening way too often~!!!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 119
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Excuse Me by Iris Originals
Excuse Me
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
I have squirrels - do you have squirrels? They are adorably annoying little creatures and love bird seed. Counted cross stitch pattern....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:105w x 78
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, "I'm Dead without My Coffee!" by StitchyFish Designs
"I'm Dead without My Coffee!"
a Cross Stitch Pattern by StitchyFish Designs
"Dead without Coffee" pretty much speaks for itself....or for me, in the morning. If you are not able to function before your caffiene...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:80w x 80
Fabric:28ct. Linen
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$3.39
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Cross Stitch Patterns, My Little Dog by Iris Originals
My Little Dog
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
And, this is SO TRUE of my little dog. He is barking as I type - probably because a cricket jumped outside. But, he's a sweetie, small...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:111w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida Aida
Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Don't Interrupt by Imaginating
Don't Interrupt
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
This leaflet includes the chart and instructions.   The floss, fabric and any other supplies required to complete the project are...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:160w x 140
Fabric:18ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Multi Tasker by Iris Originals
Multi Tasker
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Oh yeah - this is one of my better talents - "Listen, ignore and forget all at the same time." Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:119w x 147
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, My Cat Thinks I'm Cool by Cross Stitch Wonders
My Cat Thinks I'm Cool
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
My Cat Thinks I'm Cool She's Very Wise. (omit the S in she if you have a male cat) :-) A GREAT CAT SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:160w x 155
Fabric:16ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Before My Morning Coffee by Artecy Cross Stitch
Before My Morning Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artecy Cross Stitch
This counted cross stitch pattern of Roosevelt the cat was designed from the beautiful artwork of Gail Gastfield. Only full cross stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:198w x 230
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:58 DMC colors
$15.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Wine Drinker ... Camping Problem by Cross Stitch Wonders
Wine Drinker ... Camping Problem
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great WINE/CAMPING Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this from Exclusive artwork by Sanquentti Design....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:98w x 150
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Love Chocolate by Imaginating
I Love Chocolate
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
This leaflet includes the chart and instructions.   The floss, fabric and any other supplies required to complete the project are...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:134w x 54
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:6 DMC colors
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Stupid Things by Iris Originals
Stupid Things
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Another 'old people' chart - and I'm entitled to offer this.... since I'm old. Hopefully I'm not doing quite as many stupid things,...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:110w x 103
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Adulting Is Hard by Rogue Stitchery
Adulting Is Hard
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Rogue Stitchery
Coffee! A favorite drink of so many of us. This pattern calls out to the coffee lover. Designed with a whimsical saying, it uses...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 70
Fabric:14ct. Aida
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Warrior Queen by Iris Originals
Warrior Queen
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yup, that's me - older and meaner all the time. I like the title "Warrior Queen"
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:92w x 92
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Ex-People Person by Imaginating
Ex-People Person
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
This cheeky pattern features the phrase “I used to be a people person but people ruined it for me”, with a no-nonsense lady throwing up the...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:99w x 121
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 DMC colors
Multiple styles available
On Sale:$7.65
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