Funny Phrases Cross Stitch Patterns

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Lick the Frosting by Iris Originals
Lick the Frosting
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, that's what they tell me anyway - that muffins are healthy! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 93w x 79h. Stitched on...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:93w x 79
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Lids on Jars by Iris Originals
Lids on Jars
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, this seems to be an everyday occasion in my life - anytime I'm faced with a jar, bottle or whatever needs to be opened. Yeah, I know...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:89w x 85
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Life ... Coffee N' Wine by Cross Stitch Wonders
Life ... Coffee N' Wine
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great COFFEE/WINE Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this from Exclusive artwork by Sanquentti Design. ...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:86w x 97
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Life Happens by Iris Originals
Life Happens
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, that's the way I feel a lot of mornings (and afternoons and evenings). Coffee always helps.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:75w x 61
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Life Happns by Iris Originals
Life Happns
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Always - coffee always helps!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:85w x 94
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:13 colors Anchor or DMC
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Life Is Better With Cats by Cross Stitch Wonders
Life Is Better With Cats
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Let your devotion to whiskers and purrs shine in every stitch! This delightful pattern spells out a heartfelt truth with playfulness—Life...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:98w x 108
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Life is Too Short for Bad Coffee by Cross Stitch Wonders
Life is Too Short for Bad Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Great COFFEE Saying Design in counted cross stitch! Marcia Manning designed this from artwork by Sanquentti Design. Design is 88...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:88w x 100
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Life Is What Happens Between Coffee And Beer by Cross Stitch Wonders
Life Is What Happens Between Coffee And Beer
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A great LIFE IS WHAT HAPPENS BETWEEN COFFEE AND BEER saying/phrase design. Designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 80 stitches wide by 128...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:80w x 128
Fabric:16ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Life Update Still Love Cats People Not So Much by Cross Stitch Wonders
Life Update Still Love Cats People Not So Much
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
PURRFECT! ADORABLE CAT Saying by Marcia Manning. Original Art by Funky Frog Creative Designs. Design is 110 stitches wide by 128 stitches...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:110w x 128
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Life Update Still Love Dogs People Not So Much by Cross Stitch Wonders
Life Update Still Love Dogs People Not So Much
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
ADORABLE DOG Saying by Marcia Manning. Original Art by Funky Frog Creative Designs. Design is 110 stitches wide by 128 stitches high.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:110w x 128
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
$4.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Light Up! by White Willow Stitching
Light Up!
a Cross Stitch Pattern by White Willow Stitching
Light Up! is designed by StitchBitch. Created for those with a wicked, sharp and twisted sense of humor. This chart does use both full...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:57w x 83
Fabric:14ct. Aida Black
Floss:6 DMC floss colors
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, List to do by Kiokiz
List to do
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Kiokiz
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:127w x 85
Fabric:0
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Little Chuckles-No Thinking Before I Speak by MarNic Designs
Little Chuckles-No Thinking Before I Speak
a Cross Stitch Pattern by MarNic Designs
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:147w x 129
Fabric:0
$8.99
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Loads Of Fun (Laundry Company2) by Hands on Design
Loads Of Fun (Laundry Company2)
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Hands on Design
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Look in the Mirror by Iris Originals
Look in the Mirror
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Probably this never happens to you - but it's the same at my house every day. "Who is that person?"
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:87w x 114
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:8 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Look in the Mirror by Iris Originals
Look in the Mirror
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Sadly - that happens to me frequently. What on earth did happen? Oh well, sometimes it gives me a laugh.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:92w x 129
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Lose Something by Iris Originals
Lose Something
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Oh yeah! That's my life these days. I just wish I knew where all those "safe places" are.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:93w x 88
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Lots of Stuff by Iris Originals
Lots of Stuff
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well yeah - that's my usual day.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:92w x 96
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 Anchor or DMC colors
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Lots of Things by Iris Originals
Lots of Things
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
If I had the energy - or the want to - that I had when I was 25 (or even 50) - I'd be a superwoman. Sadly, age is catching up with me and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:110w x 129
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Love a Great Ass by White Willow Stitching
Love a Great Ass
a Cross Stitch Pattern by White Willow Stitching
Perfect for all Donkey lovers or just those who have a jackass in the family! This sassy and humorous monochrome cross stitch chart is...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:126w x 81
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 Skeins DMC floss
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Love Peckers by White Willow Stitching
Love Peckers
a Cross Stitch Pattern by White Willow Stitching
This humorous Woodpecker monochrome cross stitch chart is designed using only full stitches making it perfect for any fabric count. 16...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:3 Skeins DMC floss
Designer:Jamie Larson
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Love Pirate by Sue Hillis Designs
Love Pirate
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
Love Pirate, Ye've plundered me heart. When stitched on 14 count fabric or "over two" on 28 count, fits into a 5 inch by 7 inch frame....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:47w x 74
Fabric:28ct. Lugana Summer Khaki
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Love You To The Moon by Imaginating
Love You To The Moon
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Shoot for the stars with this sweet and whimsical design! Featuring a colorful rocket ship, crescent moon, and twinkling stars, it’s...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:84w x 127
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Love You Warts'n All by Val's Stuff
Love You Warts'n All
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Val's Stuff
Cross stitch pattern from Val's Stuff featuring a frog with the Valentine's Day sentiment "love you warts n' all." Stitched on 36 count...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:61w x 37
Fabric:36ct. Linen Antique White
Floss:DMC
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Loves Me by Sue Hillis Designs
Loves Me
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
...Loves me, Loves me not...'tis no matter, I'm all he's got. When stitched on 14 count fabric or "over two" on 28 count, fits into a 5...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:58w x 86
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Lump of Coal by Peacock & Fig
Lump of Coal
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
Here’s the perfect gift to make for that family member that does all of their Christmas shopping at the dollar store. Tell them how much...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:60w x 60
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
$5.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Magic Beans by Iris Originals
Magic Beans
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Cute coffee design - Fairy tales and magic beans... turn me into a human.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:97w x 66
Fabric:14ct. Aida Antique White
Floss:5 DMC or Anchor
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Magic Coffee by Iris Originals
Magic Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Yes, I'm a coffee addict. I do love my coffee and I love to smell coffee. It is about as close to magic as you can get.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 94
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:6 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.30
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Make Me Shine by X's & Oh's
Make Me Shine
a Cross Stitch Pattern by X's & Oh's
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:101w x 161
Fabric:28ct. Jobelan Ivory
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Make Sense by The Stitcherhood
Make Sense
a Cross Stitch Pattern by The Stitcherhood
A fun cross stitch design with a snarky comment and colorful blocks, perfect decor for teens, or parents of teens! Stitch Count: 63 High...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:112w x 63
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:DMC #3799 (dark gray), #826 (blue) and #912 (green)
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Margarita Gnome by Cross Stitch Wonders
Margarita Gnome
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
This adorable MARGARITA GNOME is great whether stitched by itself or along with the funny saying. Marcia Manning designed this from...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:130w x 117
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Market Fresh Puns by Cross Stitch Wonders
Market Fresh Puns
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Five great MARKET FRESH PUNS in counted cross stitch. Designed by Marcia Manning All of the designs are with 100 stitches wide or...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Marcia Manning
$18.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Matilda Mallstomper by Alma Lynne Designs
Matilda Mallstomper
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Alma Lynne Designs
Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 180 x 248. Model stitched on 14ct Antique White Aida using DMC floss.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:180w x 248
Fabric:14ct. Aida Antique White
Floss:39 DMC colors
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, May Your Coffee Kick In by Romy's Creations
May Your Coffee Kick In
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Romy's Creations
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, May Your Frogs be Few by Iris Originals
May Your Frogs be Few
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
May your stitch count be true and your frogs be few. Cross stitching friends will understand this for sure. Counted cross stitch pattern....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:85w x 87
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 DMC colors
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Maybe Wine will Help by Peacock & Fig
Maybe Wine will Help
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
If you’re drowning in a sea of stress and the daily grind is getting to you, the Maybe Wine Will Help fun cross stitch pattern will pick...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Me, Weird? by Iris Originals
Me, Weird?
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Of course I'm not weird!! Never mind what my hubby or my kids say. I am absolutely unique!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:99w x 96
Fabric:14ct. Aida white
Floss:7 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Measure of a Man by White Willow Stitching
Measure of a Man
a Cross Stitch Pattern by White Willow Stitching
Ready to giggle? Between fish stories and other man stories many of us know this one in our sleep and now StitchBitch has brought it to us...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:3 DMC Floss colors
Designer:StitchBitch
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Medic Alert Bracelet by Iris Originals
Medic Alert Bracelet
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well yeah! Very true statement - probably always needs coffee. Great chart to do as a gift to your coffee drinking friend
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:103w x 112
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 colors Anchor or DMC
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Memory Error by Silver Creek Samplers
Memory Error
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Silver Creek Samplers
Add a nostalgic twist to your stitching with Memory Error by Silver Creek Samplers. This playful design features a retro-inspired character...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:123w x 77
Fabric:18ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss
$13.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Menopausal Dwarves by Sue Hillis Designs
Menopausal Dwarves
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
Itchy Bitchy Sleepy Sweaty Bloaty Forgetful and Psycho.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:55w x 84
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Mermaid Struggles by Peacock & Fig
Mermaid Struggles
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
The fourth of the Mermaid Tales cross stitch pattern set, this sassy cross stitch pattern inspires you to take a beach holiday. Beautiful...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC, Kreinik
Designer:Peacock & Fig
$8.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, MetalFoot's Missives I by Stitchnmomma
MetalFoot's Missives I
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
A fun, easy stitched "subversive" style quote in a series created by my son "MetalFoot". This design uses just 4 colors and all full...
Pattern Details:
Size:varies with fabric used
Fabric:0
Floss:4 DMC Cotton Colors
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Midlife by Sampler Sensibility
Midlife
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sampler Sensibility
"I am out with lanterns, looking for myself " -from a letter to Elizabeth Holland from Emily Dickinson, 1856 Relatable quote to all on...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:118w x 36
Fabric:28ct. Linen Antique White
Floss:Gentle Art, DMC
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Minis: Chocolate is the Answer by PinoyStitch
Minis: Chocolate is the Answer
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross Stitch Pattern: Chocolate is the Answer Designed by: ©...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:57w x 59
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Colors: 10
Multiple styles available
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Minis: Witchy Woman by PinoyStitch
Minis: Witchy Woman
a Cross Stitch Pattern by PinoyStitch
Cross Stitch Pattern: Witchy Woman Designed by: ©...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:58w x 48
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC Colors: 4
Multiple styles available
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Mirror Mirror by Peacock & Fig
Mirror Mirror
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
The Mirror Mirror cross stitch pattern, the third of the Mermaid Tales cross stitch pattern set, is a cheeky look at a mermaid’s beauty...
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC, Kreinik
Designer:Peacock & Fig
$8.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Miserable Cow by Peacock & Fig
Miserable Cow
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock & Fig
This funny cross stitch pattern can help remind you to be a sparkly unicorn, not a miserable cow.
Pattern Details:
Fabric:0
Floss:DMC
Designer:Peacock & Fig
$11.98
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Modern Dictionary: Boy by Stitchnmomma
Modern Dictionary: Boy
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
Looking for a quick weekend project? Then this piece from my Modern Dictionary Series is perfect for you! This series gives fun, modern...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:54w x 33
Fabric:14ct. aida
Floss:1 DMC Cotton color
$7.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Modern Dictionary: Girl by Stitchnmomma
Modern Dictionary: Girl
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
Looking for a quick weekend project? Then this piece from my Modern Dictionary Series is perfect for you! This series gives fun, modern...
Pattern Details:
Size:varies with fabric used
Fabric:0
Floss:1 DMC Cotton color
$7.50
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