Funny Phrases: Cross Stitch Patterns & Kits

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Here For The Candy by Crafty Bluebonnet Designs
Here For The Candy
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Crafty Bluebonnet Designs
A sweet and spooky Halloween design featuring a playful “Just Here for the Candy” saying, complete with a candy corn accent, spider and...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:47w x 46
Fabric:28ct. Linen Pearl Gray
Floss:DMC Floss
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Wine Gnome by Cross Stitch Wonders
Wine Gnome
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
The gnome can be stitched by itself or along with the funny saying. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch counts: 130 x 116 (gnome &...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:130w x 116
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:19 DMC colors
On Sale:$6.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, When I Was a Kid by Iris Originals
When I Was a Kid
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
When I was a kid I wanted to be older - This is not what I expected. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 95 x 91. Model stitched...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:95w x 91
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 DMC colors
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Women Who Behave by Sue Hillis Designs
Women Who Behave
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
Part of the Pirates series. Women who behave - Rarely make history. Handcuffs charm included. Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count:...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 60
Fabric:14ct. Aida Sage/Summer Khaki
Floss:13 DMC colors
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Dear Santa by Cross Stitch Wonders
Dear Santa
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 110 x 245. Model stitched on 14ct White Aida using DMC floss. Design is all full cross...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:110w x 245
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:1 DMC color
On Sale:$3.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, My Thoughts by Iris Originals
My Thoughts
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Sometimes the thoughts in my head get bored and stroll out of my mouth! That's never a good thing! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:91w x 106
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 DMC colors
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Getting Old Ain't for Sissies by Iris Originals
Getting Old Ain't for Sissies
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Well, this one about says it all - getting old definitely AIN'T for Sissies! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 143 x 133....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:143w x 133
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC & Anchor
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Love You To The Moon by Imaginating
Love You To The Moon
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Shoot for the stars with this sweet and whimsical design! Featuring a colorful rocket ship, crescent moon, and twinkling stars, it’s...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:84w x 127
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Beware the Cat by Artists Alley
Beware the Cat
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Artists Alley
Features a sleek black kitty riding high on a broomstick, tail in the air and attitude to spare. Stitched alongside playful lettering, this...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:192w x 156
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:8 DMC colors
$10.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, If Crabby by Stitchy Prose
If Crabby
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchy Prose
A stitch for that "crabby someone" to remind them that some moods are best cured by salt air, sandy toes, and a return to the shore. The...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:120w x 80
Fabric:32ct. Linen Flax Variegated
Floss:DMC, Classic Color Works
$11.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Pirate's Creed by Sue Hillis Designs
Pirate's Creed
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
Perfect for framing, gifting, or hanging in your crafty cove, Pirate’s Creed is a hilarious nod to creative grit—whether you're sewing at...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:60w x 90
Fabric:14ct. Aida Lambswool
Floss:DMC Floss
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Let's Go To Therapy by Imaginating
Let's Go To Therapy
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
A fun and colorful project that explains what exactly is the best therapy around!Let's Go To Therapy is designed to be stitched on 14ct...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:131w x 116
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 DMC floss colors
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, I Dusted Once by Iris Originals
I Dusted Once
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
I dusted once - it came back. I'm not falling for that again! Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 90 x 76. Model stitched on...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 76
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 DMC colors
$6.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Time and Friends by Iris Originals
Time and Friends
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Counted cross stitch pattern. Stitch count: 79 x 102. Model stitched on 14ct White Aida using DMC floss.
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:79w x 102
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:9 DMC colors
$7.50
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Dog - I Wanna Be A Stay At Home Dog Mom by Cross Stitch Wonders
Dog - I Wanna Be A Stay At Home Dog Mom
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Let your heart—and hoop—speak for itself with I Wanna Be a Stay at Home Dog Mom! This adorable design features a sweet dog silhouette...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:100w x 67
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
On Sale:$3.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Getting Older by Iris Originals
Getting Older
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
Boy, is this a true statement.... and my body definitely isn't pleased, though I'm thankful for every day!
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:83w x 93
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:6 colors DMC or Anchor
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, A Cat Saying - I Wanna Be A Stay At Home Cat Mom by Cross Stitch Wonders
A Cat Saying - I Wanna Be A Stay At Home Cat Mom
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
An Adorable CAT SAYING in counted cross stitch! Cross Stitch Pattern designed by Marcia Manning. Design is 114 stitches wide by 56...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:114w x 56
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC
On Sale:$3.79
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Cross Stitch Patterns, It Takes a Village by Imaginating
It Takes a Village
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Imaginating
Parenting humor at its best, because where is that village when you need it? A lighthearted stitch for anyone who's ever felt outnumbered...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:110w x 130
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 DMC colors
Multiple styles available
$9.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Woman Who Loves Her Dogs and Coffee by MarNic Designs
Woman Who Loves Her Dogs and Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by MarNic Designs
A whimsical offering featuring a steaming cup of coffee with a little dog alongside holding a bone, and the verse "A Woman who loves her...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:87w x 60
Fabric:28ct. Linen White
Floss:DMC, Kreinik, Rainbow Gallery PTB
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Kits, Let's Drink Beer by Imaginating
Let's Drink Beer
a Cross Stitch Kit by Imaginating
Fun's A-Brewing with Ursula Michael’s beer stein filled to frothy overflowing with apropos sayings. This kit includes a piece of 14ct...
Kit Details:
Stitch Count:108w x 137
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC (6 Colors)
On Sale:$15.25
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Crabby Day by Sue Hillis Designs
Crabby Day
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sue Hillis Designs
A cheeky little design with a bright coral crab and the phrase: “It’s a crabby day without a stitch to cross.” Perfect humor for...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:59w x 64
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:9 DMC colors
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Aged Wine by Bobbie G Designs
Aged Wine
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Bobbie G Designs
Pour a little humor into your stitching with Aged Wine! Surrounded by bottles and lush bunches of grapes, this playful design features the...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:43w x 140
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
Multiple styles available
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Rolling Eyes by Iris Originals
Rolling Eyes
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Iris Originals
"I'm sorry, did I roll my eyes out loud?" I'm sure you never do that - unfortunately I do it frequently so this is an appropriate saying...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:80w x 112
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:4 colors Anchor or DMC floss
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Kits, Let's Bake by Imaginating
Let's Bake
a Cross Stitch Kit by Imaginating
Imaginating kits are produced using the highest quality of materials. Every kit uses DMC floss, and fabrics from Wichelt and Charles...
Kit Details:
Stitch Count:154w x 130
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 DMC Colors
$20.95
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