Funny Phrases: Cross Stitch Patterns & Kits

Need a laugh stitch? Choose a funny phrase cross stitch with clean lettering and simple borders. Finish a small for a desk or housewarming gift.
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Addiction vs. Virus (male) by Pine Glen Designs
Addiction vs. Virus (male)
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Pine Glen Designs
If our male youth version of our popular “Addiction vs Virus” is not suitable for the man in your life, perhaps this one will suit your man...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:59w x 83
Fabric:14ct. Aida
$5.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, One In Every Bunch by Sister Lou Stitches
One In Every Bunch
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sister Lou Stitches
$11.00
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Cross Stitch Kits, Signier Sign by Imaginating
Signier Sign
a Cross Stitch Kit by Imaginating
Sometimes the universe just needs to be a little more obvious! This humorous design features a woman searching for answers while a stack of...
Kit Details:
Stitch Count:90w x 139
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:3 DMC floss colors
$20.95
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Nerdy Words: Wine by Stitchnmomma
Nerdy Words: Wine
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
Nerdy girls like wine too! Each element has the symbol of the element along with the atomic number and atomic weight. The pattern has...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:62w x 23
Fabric:Aida
Floss:1 DMC Cotton color
$8.40
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee-isms #3 by Stitchnmomma
Coffee-isms #3
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
A fun and cheeky design for coffee lovers who know the drill: pour it first, and then they will come. Counted cross stitch pattern....
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:56w x 36
Fabric:32ct. Linen Cream
Floss:1 DMC color
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee-isms #7 by Stitchnmomma
Coffee-isms #7
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
A playful design for coffee lovers who prefer their daily buzz in a mug. This witty saying is sure to bring a smile to anyone who considers...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:49w x 48
Fabric:32ct. Linen Cream
Floss:1 DMC color
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee-isms #8 by Stitchnmomma
Coffee-isms #8
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
A fun and relatable design for coffee lovers who know that a little caffeine can make any conversation better. Counted cross stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:39w x 36
Fabric:32ct. Linen Cream
Floss:1 DMC color
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Coffee-isms #9 by Stitchnmomma
Coffee-isms #9
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
A fun and charming design for coffee lovers who know that a freshly brewed cup is truly the language of love. Counted cross stitch...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:55w x 48
Fabric:32ct. Linen Cream
Floss:1 DMC color
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Feral by Stitchnmomma
Feral
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
Is it meno-rage? Is it acute sleep deprivation? Is it the current state of our country? I don’t know, but I know it has been my current...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:65w x 28
Fabric:28ct. Linen
Floss:DMC Floss
$6.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Glitter Over Gloom by Stitchnmomma
Glitter Over Gloom
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
A simple yet uplifting reminder to keep shining through life's tougher moments. This inspiring design encourages you to choose glitter over...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:54w x 72
Fabric:32ct. Linen
Floss:Your Choice
$8.40
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Skip the Fries by Stitchnmomma
Skip the Fries
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Stitchnmomma
Never skip the fries, sometimes they are the best part. *NOTES ABOUT THE STITCHED MODEL* I stitched the model on a cotton french fry...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:77w x 85
Fabric:14ct. Aida
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.20
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Cross Stitch Patterns, It's All About the Stash by Sambrie Stitches Designs
It's All About the Stash
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Sambrie Stitches Designs
Features colorful stitching motifs, cheerful accents and the perfectly honest phrase “It's all about the stash!” Celebrates the joy of...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:69w x 69
Fabric:18ct. Aida
Floss:7 DMC colors
$8.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Black Friday Queen by Alessandra Adelaide Needleworks
Black Friday Queen
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Alessandra Adelaide Needleworks
Rule the biggest shopping day of the year with this fun and festive design! Perfect for Black Friday enthusiasts who proudly wear the title...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:132w x 135
Fabric:32ct. Linen White
Floss:DMC Floss
$12.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - Eye Rolling is My Cardio by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - Eye Rolling is My Cardio
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Perfect for anyone fluent in sarcasm, this colorful design features the hilarious phrase, "Eye Rolling Is My Cardio." A fun stitch that's...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - It's a Beautiful Day to Leave Me Alone by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - It's a Beautiful Day to Leave Me Alone
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A cheerful reminder to embrace each day with a positive outlook, this uplifting design encourages you to focus on the sunshine and leave...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series I - It's Okay if You Don't Like Me. Not Everyone Has Good Taste. by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series I - It's Okay if You Don't Like Me. Not Everyone Has Good Taste.
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A little sassy and full of confidence, this humorous design is perfect for anyone who believes that not everyone has good taste. A fun...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:109w x 160
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Butt First Coffee by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Butt First Coffee
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Start your day with a smile and a cup of coffee! This playful design featuring a mischievous cat is the perfect stitch for coffee lovers...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Come to the Dark Side We Have Cookies by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Come to the Dark Side We Have Cookies
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
oin the fun side with this cheeky design featuring the irresistible invitation, "Come to the Dark Side... We Have Cookies." A playful...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - I Don't Like Morning People. Or People. Or Mornings. by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - I Don't Like Morning People. Or People. Or Mornings.
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Not a morning person? This hilarious design says it all! Perfect for anyone who needs coffee before conversation and isn't afraid to admit...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - I Eat Cake Because It's Somebody's Birthday Somewhere by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - I Eat Cake Because It's Somebody's Birthday Somewhere
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Life's too short to skip dessert! This colorful and lighthearted design is perfect for anyone who believes it's always somebody's birthday...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Kiss My Sass by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Kiss My Sass
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
A little bold, a little sassy, and guaranteed to get a laugh! This playful design is perfect for anyone with a feisty sense of humor and a...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Sarcasm Level Expert by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Sarcasm Level Expert
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
For those who have mastered the art of witty comebacks, this hilarious design features a "Sarcasm Level: Expert" meter that's perfect for...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Sassy Threads Series II - Zero Meows Given by Cross Stitch Wonders
Sassy Threads Series II - Zero Meows Given
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Cross Stitch Wonders
Perfect for cat lovers with a sassy streak, this playful design features the cheeky phrase "Zero Meows Given." A fun stitch that's sure to...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:140w x 99
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:DMC Floss
$7.00
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Cross Stitch Patterns, Don't Die by Mary Engelbreit by Spot Colors
Don't Die by Mary Engelbreit
a Cross Stitch Pattern by Spot Colors
Featuring a mischievous opossum and a playful reminder to "Don't Die Before You're Dead," this quirky design is perfect for anyone who...
Pattern Details:
Stitch Count:96w x 121
Fabric:14ct. Aida White
Floss:5 DMC colors
$12.00
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